Big Brother

Posted by johnnysweeptheleg It’s the question everyone is asking in the Big Brother house. Who shot JR? Oh, and who offered Dan the money? Was it Jerry or April? Michelle thinks it’s Jerry. April has somehow gotten herself to believe that Dan couldn’t possibly be talking about her since she technically didn’t give him a dollar amount. I believe that she actually believes this, since she also believes that she’s done nothing to anyone in the house and doesn’t deserve to be on the block. April also believes in unicorns, leprechauns and jackalopes. Ollie and April realize they need to […]

Posted by johnnysweeptheleg Renny’s nominations as HOH have certainly gotten her out from under the radar. Memphis and Dan don’t trust her after her decision to keep Ollie off the block, and even Keesha — Renny’s closest ally — doesn’t fully trust her anymore. The POV competition is important for every single player in this house. Ollie wants in because people forget he’s even in the house he wants to take his friend (with benefits) off the block. Dan and Memphis want Ollie out of the POV because they know this, and that Ollie won’t be the one to replace […]

Posted by johnnysweeptheleg Viewers tune in to Big Brother for the drama, not for everything to be all lollipops. But by the end of last night’s episode, that’s what it was. Lollipops. Literally. To start the episode, all Ollie and April want to do is friend each other. From what I’ve heard about the live feeds, they make like Lionel Richie and friend all night long. But Jerry’s been around lately, every time they want to friend. Even when they leave the room, and run to a bedroom, moments later, Jerry will meander over their way, and crash their party. […]

Posted by johnnysweeptheleg Wow, so how dull was last night’s show? I can’t do a straight up (not a Paula Abdul reference) recap of the show. It would put you to sleep. Only thing I can think of is to recap as though two valley girls from 1983 were talking to each other about the show. So I’ll let Suzy and Jamie give you the recap. S: Ok, so the house was dealing with, like, the aftermath of the Judas comment. J: I dunno. I’m all confused now. Dan looks nothing like the guy from Judas Priest. Why does Jerry […]

Posted by johnnysweeptheleg I don’t expect to see any slo-mo video montages of Dan and Jerry skipping hand-in-hand with The Turtles “Happy Together” playing over it. After last night’s episode, we learned that Jerry is absolutely obsessed with Dan. In fact, if the houseguests had rabbits in the house, I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised to see Jerry boiling Dan’s bunny during an upcoming episode. Since Michelle’s nominations, the plan has been to vote Libra out. The only one who could change this, is Jerry. If he wins POV, all bets are off. This week’s POV competition is called […]

Posted by johnnysweeptheleg Well I’m glad to see that the more things change, the more they stay the same in this house. Just as the show ended on Thursday night, on Sunday the hamsters are still fighting. Although suddenly, April and Michelle are BFFs. Funny what winning an HOH will do for your approval rating. Before HOH keys have even been exchanged, the yelling begins. Anytime Jerry attempts to shout at someone, with the hoarseness and strain on his voice, I’m waiting for him to raise his cane and shuffle after houseguests who have walked across his lawn. After metaphorically […]

Posted by johnnysweeptheleg It’s a sad day for yours truly. This morning, I’m pouring out a little protein shake for a fallen houseguest. But our tears have gotten us ahead of ourselves. Let’s see how we got there, first. Libra and Keesha have had enough of Jessie’s antics, and decide they want him out more than Memphis. So they try to sway April. They point out that by keeping Jessie, two members of their alliance will be targets next week. But April won’t budge. Therefore, Libra and Keesha decide to flip things and go against her wishes. Dan is the […]

Posted by johnnysweeptheleg Remember how we were complaining about the lovey-dovey nature of the houseguests, just a week or two ago? Yeah, those days are definitely over. Although, before all of the infighting, we did have a delicate moment between two houseguests. To complete his task as America’s Player, Dan must hug it out with Jessie for 10 seconds. Dan has an inkling that deep beneath the flesh, under the muscle, and buried under the d-baggery, there’s a sensitive guy. So he concocts a tear-jerker about being afraid his girlfriend won’t wait for him when he leaves the house. And […]

Posted by johnnysweeptheleg If you remember, the houseguests have been hanging off a building since Thursday. Sadly, there is no Kim Wilde “Keep Me Hanging On” playing in the background. But there is Jessie passing the time by explaining to his fellow houseguests exactly which muscles they are using in this competition. Ironically, he neglects to mention the jaw muscle. Jerry and Libra fall out fairly early. Dan continues with his “look weak” strategy and drops. But Libra observes in her D.R. session that it appears he is throwing competitions. Be careful, Dan. Sadly for Jessie, he falls, and can’t […]

Who says reality television is nothing but mindless entertainment for the mouth-breathers of the world? Last night’s Big Brother was an educational experience. As a Mid-Westerner, I wasn’t sure what protocol was for being stuck in an earthquake. The cameras were rolling when this week’s earthquake hit southern California. Memphis directed the houseguests to the middle of the backyard. I already figured that was a safe move. But Jessie taught me that it’s imperative that you then take your shirt off if caught in an earthquake. I never heard of that before, but why else would he tear his shirt […]