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Reality TV

Tsk, Tsk, Project Runway A Shamecap

That’s right, I’m not calling this a recap. No, no, this is a Project Runway shamecap — a recap laden with shame for the program being recapped. Why, you may ask? Because the teases for the upcoming episode promised me a Jack announcement that would be shocking — SHOCKING, I tell you. Did I get that? No. I got dooky squat, was what I got. Oh, you’ll see the tease as they open the show, but you’ll get no resolution or any sort of leatherwork-help-getting-cheating or pattern-book-hiding satisfaction. Grr. So we have the blah, blah, “Why did she have to […]

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Reality TV

ANTM Recap: The Girls Go to Shanghai

The girls of America’s Next Top Model are packing furiously to go to China. Tyra gives them books on China, as I’m sure they’ll be doing tons of sightseeing, as recommended by The Lonely Planet. Thankfully, most of our “models” pick up a few phrases. Oh, yeah, and there’s a competition. Lisa’s all wigged about being in the bottom 2. Saleisha is all sad about leaving their gorgeous house, but, whatever, we’re going to China! And in the blink of an eye, they’re there! In Shanghai! In a bus! Squeal! My favorite line of this episode then comes from above, […]

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Drama

Dexter: The Skank vs. Debs

Dexter has always been something of an innocent when it comes to understanding the non-homicidal urges of the human species. In episode 7, he falls into clinging Lila’s trap completely. Matter of fact, he was so obviously clueless that it was depressing to just sit down and write about how completely she had him wrapped around her pale and beautiful little finger, torching her apartment so he have to leave Rita and the kids and go and hold her scrawny smoke-covered body. So depressing, as a matter of fact, that I couldn’t write about it. But what a difference a […]

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Reality TV

Amazing Race: Please, Lord, Give Me Milk

The remaining teams leave from the Pit Stop at Durgedam. We learn that Ronald has developed a hernia as he was driving the bakfiets. The doctor tells him, “I reduced the swelling by pushing back the tissue into your abdomen.” Bex: Somehow, I don’t feel too sorry for him. The first to leave the Pit Stop are Lorena & Jason. They are to go to Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso and go to the train station to find their next clue. Bex: It was fun trying to count how many different ways the teams pronounced Ouagadougou. We find out a bit more […]

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Drama

A Preview/Review of “Battlestar Galactica: Razor”

Raise your hand if you were bummed to hear that Razor would be about Pegasus instead of Galactica. Quite a few, okay … Now raise your hand if you were even more bummed to hear that it would be about events that had already taken place. Almost everyone, wow … All right, now raise your hand if you yelled “oh, come ON!” when you heard that it would mainly be about Admiral Cain and focus on a character we’ve never heard of before. Thought so. I was just like you. Kind of thinking, “As much as I desperately need a […]

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Sports

Stanford Vs. Cal: “The Play” Lives On

25 years later, the band still comes onto the field … Hard to believe it’s been 25 years since “The Play.” It’s been replayed and talked about countless times since. Versus reunited John Elway, Kevin Moen, Gary Tyrrell and Joe Starkey to celebrate the 25th anniversary of that game and share their memories in an hourlong special called Cal vs. Stanford: 25 Years Later, airing Nov. 24 at 6pm ET (it reairs Nov. 24 at 11pm, Nov. 28 at 7pm & 2am, and Dec. 1 at 2:30pm). The special was taped last month, and I had the chance to talk […]

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Comedy

“How I Met Your Mother” Recap: Slapsgiving

It’s finally here. The How I Met Your Mother episode we’ve been waiting for ever since slap-bet winner Marshall set the countdown clock at the end of the season premiere: “Slapsgiving.” The episode begins with a quick flashback to when Ted and Robin were still dating — and annoying everyone else by saluting fake military figures who come up in casual conversation, such as General Knowledge, Corporal Punishment and Colonel Stuckinmyteeth. Back in the present, that chemistry is gone and Ted explains to his kids how awkward it is trying to remain friends with your ex. For instance, it makes […]

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Comedy

Son Of A Piñata!: A "Family Guy" Recap

Posted by Sarah Quahog’s Veterans Day celebration is the place to be. During the parade, Peter decides to try “The John McCain Experience”: He crawls into a bamboo cage and is poked with a sharp stick until he starts crying “I wanna be president!” Then Herbert starts singing “I’m Proud to Be an American” with a children’s choir, and the whole town is moved to tears. The performance inspires Peter to be the most patriotic he can be, which for him means wearing a sparkly American flag suit that Stewie says makes him look like the Statue of Liberty’s pimp. […]

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7 Questions With...

8 Questions With … Sal Masekela

1. What has been your strangest fan encounter? Sal Masekela: Last year at the Summer X Games, this kid followed me around all day, begging me for a dreadlock. It was like one of those movies where every time you turned around the corner, he was standing there. Finally, the last day, I was like, “All right. That’s it. Go get some scissors.” I cut off half of a dreadlock. I couldn’t believe how excited the kid was. 2. You’re at a magazine rack and can pick three magazines. What are they? Complex, Vanity Fair and Surfer. 3. What’s your […]

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Comedy

Countdown To Extinction Week 6: A “Cavemen” Recap

Like “The Onion” once did with John Leguizamo’s abysmal sketch show “House of Buggin’,” we’re going to provide weekly recaps of “Cavemen” until it gets canceled. Thanks to a malfunctioning TiVo and some trouble with the “Watch Full Episodes” portion of ABC’s website, the recap is a little late this week. (OK, fine — really late.) So let’s not waste another minute in getting to the recap. As “Rock Vote” begins, there is a California state election coming up, and Nick and Joel each have a candidate for whom they believe an undecided — and incredibly uninformed — Andy should […]