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“Men In Trees” Recap: No Man Is An Iceland.

I bench press my own body weight, plus another seventy-five pounds. I like to drink whiskey. And one of my favorite movies of all time is Fight Club. I thought I better offer that up prior to admitting that I watch a show called Men in Trees. Others must be watching it, since the show was picked up for its second season. But I venture a guess that most of them don’t have guy parts. Where are we at the start? Jack and the girl formerly of Family Ties have split. So because Lynn and her pregnant-with-some-other-guy’s-kid self have moved […]

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Dexter Episode 4: Secrets and Lila

One of the measures of a series’ success comes when it begins attracting stars in cameo roles. This season, we’ve already seen Keith Carradine as Special Agent Lundy. Now JoBeth Williams joins the cast as Rita’s surreptitiously toxic mom, who sizes up Dexter and says, “That man is hiding something.” He warms up to her when she tells him that if the Bay Harbor Butcher is only killing evil people, Miami ought to give him a medal. Some in the city, and a lot of the BHB’s victims, agree. Unfortunately, Lundy is not one of them, and as the hunt […]

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You “Cane” Always Get What You Want — A Recap

Posted by Sarah This episode could’ve been titled “Alex’s Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day.” That, or, “Someone Found Their Santana Collection and Decided to Play Every Song.” We start out in a meeting between Frank and Alex, which is normal enough until we start seeing it in green, and with the sound quality of a wiretap. Interesting. Cop-voiced cop comes into the room (there goes theory #1) and gives Alex back his gun, telling him it’s clean. Well, duh — you think Alex was going to have Quinonez shot with his own gun? The bad news is that a […]

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Dexter, Episode 3: Heading to the dark — and human — side?

Posted by Elaine B. Our hero, a.k.a. the “Bay Harbor Butcher,” now finds himself in hot water with the suddenly cold Rita. She can deal with her boyfriend’s role in her husband’s death but not with living with an addict. So, in what has to be the funniest moment this season, Dexter attends his first open meeting of NA, where, as people discuss their addiction, he contemplates the state of his knives and stock of duck tape. It’s all very boring until Lila, the dark and hot and vaguely gothic beauty a few rows in front of him, takes him […]

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There’s No “Cane” In “Cancer!” Oh, Wait — Yes, There Is … A Recap

Posted by Sarah Much as I’d like to put another Jimmy Smits picture up here, this episode really belongs to Pancho. It’s been promoted all week as “The episode you can’t miss,” and it lives up to its hype. Alex wakes up to find Isabel not in bed with him, but rather glaring at him from the chair by the window. She accuses him of keeping things from her, and confronts him with the gun she found in the safe. He lies through his teeth and says he’s not keeping anything from her. The gun’s just a nostalgic thing. Ri-i-ight. […]

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“Cane” You Feel The Love Tonight? — A Recap

Posted by Sarah We open with Alex telling Santo he’s got a new job for him, that requires less work and pays more money — he wants him to be his driver. “There’s no uniform — just a clean shirt, and a gun. And make sure you shave every day.” Cut to Henry, who’s having The Tall Guy-esque sex with a woman we don’t know yet. Then he asks her, “How much?” and she says, “$500,000.” She means that she’s an architect and that’s how much it’ll cost to build the new VIP room at his club and continue sleeping […]

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C.S.I.: Er, This Is Not The Way To Stave Off McDreamy

What the hell was that? I mean, when Tarantino grabbed the reins at C.S.I., the show got a little goofy and an extra dab creepy, but at least it kept a pinkie toe within the bounds of believability. And most importantly, it was still great fun, and completely engrossing, to watch. Last night, after having a plot thread that promised the reunion of the team plus a tasty side dish of Sara/Grissom romance dangled in our eager faces, what we got instead was an endlessly tasteless mishmash that appeared to be penned by a gang of frat boys with posters […]

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House: Osama The Astronaut Gets A Lifesaving Boob Job

Or House: Kumar With No Harold Goes to Princeton-Plainsboro Or House: I Hear Cameron, Chase and Foreman. With My Eyes. Forgive me for a quick minute while I try to land that whole thing about hearing with one’s eyes — the primary complaint of Patient du Jour for Season 4, episode 2. Cause I’m really stuck on that sucker. And whether or not I’m actually continually aware that sound enters through the sides of my head alone. And how, since PdJ actually seems to be having a particularly visual acid trip more so than any auditory issues, she decided she […]

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Tuesday Night’s All Right For Fightin’ — “Cane” Recap/Review

Posted by Sarah “To protect my family I will do anything, and that is both my blessing and my curse …” — Alex Vega, in what I assume is the new opening sequence of Cane It’s another gorgeous, sunny day in Florida, and Alex Vega is up before his alarm, looking worried. The guy’s got a lot on his mind: His father-in-law passed over his oldest natural son to make him CEO of the family business, and he just had someone bumped off for crimes past. Eventually his alarm goes off and he gets out of bed, showers, and puts […]

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House: He’s A Loner, Cuddy. A Rebel.

As the official, card-carrying, biggest fan of House, like, ever, I’ve come to a couple conclusions. One, it’s a darned good thing I’ve never been hospitalized for anything more confounding than childbirth. Because if my own medical team were forced to break into my home in search of what ails me, about all they’d discover — courtesy of 3 cats, a zillion-year-old house and five other family members who can mess a hell of a lot faster than I can clean — is that I should have been dead a long time ago. And two, after last Tuesday’s hilarious, heartbreaking […]