Articles by Jill Klitz

On Malakal, Tracy thinks Ozzy is too controlling — he decides when the tribe eats, what the tribe eats, when the chickens will be killed. She thinks he’ll win the game unless they get him out of there. Erik, meanwhile, idolizes Ozzy, who is taking the young ice cream scooper under his wing. Cirie can’t come up with enough figurative language to describe the situation — stardust comes out of Erik’s mouth when he says Ozzy’s name; the two are like the father teaching his cub in The Lion King; “I think if Ozzy were to propose marriage to Erik […]

Tracy’s not happy that there are now four Faves against three Fans on the Malakal tribe, and she’d like to get one of the Faves to flip, so they’d be back to even. Ami sees that Tracy feels on the outside, so she gives her a pep talk, telling Tracy that she, too, has felt like she’s on the bottom rung, but “I’m not going to be Poop Pants. The more you’re Poop Pants, the sooner you’re going out.” I think everyone should work “Poop Pants” into any pep talk or speech. “Win one for the Poop Pants.” “Ask not […]

Somewhere at camp, Ozzy hides the immunity idol he’d found at Exile Island. I suppose that’s an OK idea — this way, folks can’t find it in his bag. But hang on — this is the episode where the tribes get switched up, right? What if he switches tribes and ends up going to the other camp, and then he won’t have access to the idol? Or what if he forgets where he put it? I mean, I sometimes can’t recall putting bread in the toaster and then I’m pleasantly surprised when toast pops up. And that’s just a minute […]

Spoiler alert! I just watched a screener of this upcoming Thursday’s episode, and while I’m sworn to secrecy about the big stuff, I just have to share the following juicy tidbit: Never during the episode does Chet amaze people with a phenomenal display of his physical ability. Truly! Not once! Oh, and the tribes get switched up. Read on to find out the new tribes:

Some of the Faves who voted against Yau-Man last episode are now wishing they’d kicked off Eliza instead. In particular, James and Ozzy think it’s stupid that they kept one of the weakest players, who’s now sick. (Oh, come on, Yau could’ve gotten sick, too.) When Eliza points out to them that they’re talking about this in her presence, James, obviously a man of deep compassion, says, “I know you’re sitting right there, but you’re about to die.” She says hey, you could be supportive, and James says, “You’re sick AND you got attitude?” Eliza tells the camera “I hate […]

First things first: I love Cirie. Now on with the recap … The contestants decorate their bodies with war paint for the reward challenge, which involves charging across a lagoon at each other and trying to get five canvas bags into your end zone. It’s kind of like rugby with canvas bags, war paint, exposed flesh being blurred, and unathletic Chet not getting much screen time. If the challenge were just about war paint design, the Fans would’ve won — I’m thinking someone on their tribe has theater experience. Too bad the Fans didn’t have more charging-across-a-lagoon experience, as the […]

After quite a bit of bickering and inaction, the Fans eventually get a fire started and a shelter built. Make that two shelters — Tracy, Kathy and Chet build their own shelter after Jason claims a cave for himself. The other seven admire the Tracy/Kathy/Chet shelter, and Tracy helps them construct one of their own, so the Fans are sort of playing nice, but there’s a seven-three split emerging. Over on the Faves tribe, there’s still the Lovebird alliance, with the Ozzy/Amanda and James/Parvati connections. Ozzy and Amanda both comment to the camera that it’s important to keep their attraction […]

This season, it’s 10 hardcore Survivor fans against 10 previous contestants. The fans’ tribe is named Airai, and the favorites’ tribe is Malakal, but Jeff Probst just calls ’em “Fans” and “Favorites.” And so shall I. After the Fans are rowed in, they stand together and Probst tells them that the opposing tribe consists of favorites from past seasons. The Favorites come out one by one, and the Fans applaud and say “Whoo!” as each is introduced. Well, for most of them, anyway. Not so much for Eliza. As the Favorites are introduced, we see clips from their previous appearances […]

To give you an idea of how bad a contestant I would be on Survivor: I get exhausted merely from watching the two-hour finale and hourlong reunion show. The final four reflecting on their journey, the tribute to the fallen Survivors, the endurance challenge, the agonizing decision of who to take to the finals, the grueling interrogations at the final Tribal Council, Jeff Probst asking our burning questions (and leaving some unasked) at the reunion show — I’m left feeling drained and a little overheated and queasy. It’s as if parking myself in front of the TV and shushing my […]

Maybe it’s because I’m relatively new at this blogging thang, but I admit to getting a kick out of checking the blog stats for me and my fellow Channel Guide bloggers. It’s interesting to see which of my postings get lots of hits and which of my brilliant musings get barely a glance. In particular, I’m amazed (and humbled) at how many hits have come from people searching with words pertaining to Amanda and her butt (which, by the way, once again attained blurry glory in this episode, and often). So as I approach the end of my first Survivor […]