Recap: Naked and Afraid Namibia “23 Days”

Naked and Afraid Namibia Discovery Channel
Blink and you may miss Holly's Naked and Afraid experience.

It’s the season finale of Naked and Afraid, and I feel like this season is limping to the finish line. I’ve been underwhelmed by some of this season’s participants and I think that like me, Discovery is just trying to get this season done so we can regroup and look forward to Naked and Afraid XL.

This week we’re heaving back to Namibia, a country we’ve visited with Luke and Lindsay and Andrea and Joe. Discovery didn’t release any clips or pictures for this episode, so I’ll be scrambling to find images that I can use.

Don Nguyen
Age: 28 years old
Occupation: Rock Climbing Guide
Current Residence: Ellensburg, Washington
Relationship Status: In A Relationship (for 5 Years)
Survival Skills: Ethnology of Hunter/Gatherer Cultures, Zoology, Tropical Ecology, Botany
Don is a first-generation American and was born in Oklahoma City’s Little Saigon. His parents were refugees of the Vietnam War, and the stories of his parent’s harrowing escape from Vietnam are some of this earliest education in survival. Don’s older brothers introduced him to rick climbing and camping, and he continued his education in college, where he studied ecology and field biology. I think that Don’s vast knowledge of botany should serve him well, as well as the bravery that seems an inherent quality. I love that Don’s intro video showed how intensely Don prepared for Namibia by studying the area’s plants.
Initial Primitive Survival Rating (PSR) 6.0 out of 10.0

Holly Simmons
Age: 23 years old
Occupation: Rental Agent, Climbing Gym Instructor
Current Residence: Fayetteville, North Carolina
Relationship Status: In A Relationship
Survival Skills: Shelter Building, Forest/Plant Identification, Trapping, Hunting
Holly is from Wasilla, Alaska and she grew up hiking, climbing and rafting and became interested in survival at a young age. She learned how to identify harmful and beneficial plants and animals, how to build shelters in both an arctic and vegetative environments, and how to trap and hunt. Holly is an avid rock climber; and will enter the police academy this fall.
Initial Primitive Survival Rating (PSR) 6.2 out of 10.0

From the looks of things around camp, it appears that Don and Holly’s primitive survival items are a cooking pot, a crazy knife that has both an axe blade and a cutting edge, and a fire starter. In addition, Don is wearing his glasses, which may be useful if there are problems with the fire starter.

This week, our survival location is Namibia’s Caprivi Strip. It’s home to lions, gibbons, alligators, and hippos; and can be scorching hot during the day and frigidly cold at night. But on the upside, the area has plenty of water.

Naked and Afraid Namibia

Day 1
Holly makes the ill-advised decision to drink directly from their water source using a water lily as a straw. She claims that the lily filters out pathogens. It seems impatient to me, because although he waits until sundown to make a fire, Don succeeds in making fire and I’d much rather be thirsty that sick. That night, Holly vomits several times and I cross off “lily straw” as a viable survival nugget that I’ve learned from Naked and Afraid.

Day 2
Don wakes up and is chipper, while Holly is nauseous. Don’s worried about his partner and to lift her spirits, he finds the Marula tree, which grows fruit that is a favorite food of elephants and baboons. Don tries some of the tasty fruit and brings some back for his partner. Holly thinks the vitamin-rich fruit is gross, which makes Don do a triple take. And when she tells her partner that she’s going to tap out, I think Don’s eyes are going to pop out of his head! Is this woman serious?!? She’s been in Africa for less than 24 hours! She can’t give up; she’s not even dirty yet! Don desperately tries to keep her head in the game, but her mind is made up.

After Holly leaves, Don has a long and lonely night. Don hasn’t made shelter yet, and has bedded down in a pile of grass.

Day 3
In the morning, Don reveals that the night before he had heard lions calling to each other and heard hippos much closer. If I were in a nice, strong shelter the sounds would have been an amazing thrill; but if I was lying in a pile of grass like Don, I would have soiled myself.

A producer alerts Don that because his partner left so early, he will be given a new partner. And because he’ll have a new partner, it will reset his 21-day survival experience. Don agrees without a moment’s hesitation. This is the first time that Naked and Afraid has had a survivalist start the experience over. I wonder — how many days would you have to be into an experience before you just say, “Nah, I’ll go it alone.” I think I could restart on Day 2 or 3, but no more than that. By day 4 I’d be into a groove.

His partner is Amber Hargrove, who we met saw in the Florida everglades! She’s an Army instructor who tried to bully her partner into hunting for crocodiles before tapping out before the end of the 21 days. Amber’s partner Ryan Holt was one of my favorite N&A participants and was recently announced as a member of this season’s Naked and Afraid XL cast. I wonder if Don was taken back to base camp for a few days while Amber was flown to location.
Her PSR is the same as it was when she left Florida: 7.4

Day 1 (take 2!)
Amber is she’s strong and confident and immediately starts ordering Don around. Because Don’s first camp has essence of Holly in it, she wants to start anew. Amber enjoys Don’s marula fruit, but really wants meat. That night, Amber’s tummy hurts and she experiences diarrhea.

Day 2
Don scolds his partner for leaving her poop around camp. Amber isn’t thrilled to be told what to do. Too bad Amber, you can’t leave your poop lying around and not expect your partner to say something; that’s just gross.

Day 3
Don wants to build a better shelter so asks his partner to help him collect palms, but Amber refuses. She’d rather stay close to camp and collect wood. I think that Amber is reluctant to fall into the role of “helper” because as a military instructor, she’s used to having people follow her orders. I would have through after her humiliating failure in Florida, that she would have learned humility.

Day 6
When Don and Amber leave camp to cut palms, monkeys sneak into their shelter and poach their fruit. “We’re gonna die,” Amber shrugs.

Day 7
Amber teaches her partner to make a spear and they try to spearfish. I can’t believe it took Amber a full week to teach anything remotely useful to her partner. She was griping about food on day 1, and this looks like the first time they’ve for any other food than fruit.
That night, Amber feels a rush of pain to her breast.

Day 8
Amber thinks that she may have ruptured her breast implant. I didn’t think that it was possible. But my bosoms are God-given; so I really can’t comment on implant care and maintenance. But please, dear readers, feel free to comment below!

With rain on the horizon, Don encourages Amber and her wounded chest to help fortify the shelter. And then they squabble over who should carry a heavier load of cuttings. Don thinks that she’s stronger and can carry a heavy load, and Amber tells him that as the man, it’s his duty to carry more. Both Don and Amber show themselves as asses here; if they are partners, they should shoulder the burden equally.

Day 9
Amber is still in pain. And she ends her time in Africa. Don doesn’t understand what he’s doing wrong to drive away his partners. I don’t think it’s you, Don. I think that you were set up with the wrong women. If Don had a partner like Eva, he would have been able to learn a lot.

Day 10
“My biggest obstacles have been trying to keep naked women in Africa,” ponders Don. It like that this guy still has his sense of humor. That night, Don spends his night sitting by the fire, knowing that his precious fire is the only think keeping the predators away and him in the game.

Day 11
Don is desperate for food, so he fashions fish trap using knowledge he gleaned from a Boy Scout handbook. It looks pretty good! This gives me hope as a fan of Naked and Afraid. I was not raised surviving outdoors. My family doesn’t camp. However, my dad is a former Green Beret who instilled common sense in his daughters. And I am a voracious reader. And I watch a lot of Naked and Afraid. So maybe one day I’ll be a part of the show.

Naked and Afraid Namibia

Day 14-17
Don’s fish trap is empty. I keep wondering when Don is going to find a “pity snake” near his shelter.

Day 18
Don’s fish trap is empty… again and to add insult to injury, a major storm is about to unload on his head. He tries to stay warm and dry, but he knows that he’s becoming hypothermic.

In the midst of a commercial, we catch up with Amber at home in Colorado. She has a painful bosom bruise, and thinks that her injury may require surgery. But I think it’s totally fishy that she’s already been home for a week and doesn’t have a more exact medical diagnosis than a bruise.

Day 19
After the commercial break, I can’t believe that Don has survived the night!! He was thin when he began his 21-day survival experience, but not he looks absolutely skeletal. And though he has no energy, he still gets up to do his chores. Sadly, his fish trap is empty again.

Despite the emotional toil of losing his partner (twice!) and his lack of food, Don is remarkably optimistic and grateful. He marvels, “The weather is so related to emotion here!” and finds himself awestruck by the beauty of his unforgiving home. He’s driven to tears by how untapped and magnificent Namibia is. As if the gods hear him, two small fish swim in to his trap and Don is overjoyed by the small meal.

Day 21
Don’s extraction has two choices: A shorter route through pools that may contain predators, or a longer way that avoids the wet threats. Fearless Don decides that faster is better and wades through the water. While he walks, Discovery treats us to shots of vicious animals. I’m sure they exist in Namibia, but I doubt that hyenas are licking their chops as Don walks through a swampy pool.

Over the course of 23 days, Don lost 14 pounds. I know this doesn’t seem like a lot, but he probably only weighed 120 pounds at the start.
Don’s PSR rose from 6.0 to 7.5 out of 10.0

This episode, we learned the final three contestants of this summer’s Naked and Afraid XL.
Stacey from Croatia, who had to tap out after suffering a painful butt burn. I am glad that she’ll get another chance.
Oh lord, it’s Clarence. I guess you get what you wish for, because last week I wished for a wild card. And here he is!
Jake Nodar the horse trainer. I missed Jake’s episode due to travel with my family, but he is a confident survivalist and he’ll bring a lot of personality to the season.

69 Comments

  1. Tgi the season finale! I watch every disappointing episodes of season 5, week after weeks hoping to see 1 good episode. Hope is not lost but a fools gold for season 5 of n/a, i will not watch XL nor another episode of n/a.

  2. While watching 23 hrs Namibia, I kept getting the feeling it was somewhat scripted. To me, the man/child was kicked out of his comfortable nest at home and away from his books for him to see what it would be like to have full responsibility over himself and partner. I felt that his strategy was to use his book learning to boss his partners to do the actual work through the 21 days.

    He definitely had the least dangerous location having
    food, water and except for one night good weather.

    Even the school of fish seemed prearranged.

  3. This another fine recap. Your my second favorite read. This another show that I believe I might have watched 10 minutes whenever it first came out. Reading your recaps well hard to explain guess it’s reading is better then watching but a lot of credit has to go to you.Thanks.

  4. Thanks for doing a recap of my episode Kellie. They are all really fun to read and the comments also are a pretty cool community here too.

    • You did awesome, Don – I can tell that you have a strong spirit and genuine soul. You should feel so proud of your accomplishment!!

  5. So…just watched this episode on demand..

    Don has to be the realest dude ive ever seen on this show. Dude weighs like 120 pounds, has not one but TWO people tap out on him, and this little dude just keeps on truckin, works his ass off and overcomes! Mad props to Don!

    • Jeremy, The little dude just kept on moving forward through every adversity. He reminded me of the Eveready Bunny, just kept on going and going. He was refreshing to watch and he saved the episode from being a total loss.

      • Thats what im saying. He was the only person i could think of that i really wanted him to make it, usually the people just make me so angry because they just like lay down to whine untill they die, but homie got it done! Naked and afraid hall of fame hah.

  6. Gibbons? No. Both the voice over guy and Don identified baboons as gibbons, which is stupid. No gibbons in Africa. They’re from Indonesia/SE Asia. Also, Brock – no alligators in Africa. Crocodiles.

    • Hello, Its Don from the episode. Sorry for the misidentification. I pride myself in memorizing the different species of the world, but in that situation I had no manual to refer too and was working from purely memory. The narrator probably took my que from the footage and narrated the baboon footage as a gibbon. The correct species was “vervet monkey”. If you look them up they actually look somewhat similar to the gibbon of Asia.

      The vervet troop in the area I was camping was made brazen by their first successful raid and kept making passes at my camp. I had no ranged weapons other than my throwing stick.

  7. I’ve only watched NAAF a few times and I don’t spend my life commenting on irrelevant TV shows. However out of those few times I saw Amber twice. After the second time I was so incensed I couldn’t help myself.
    Picture this, Amber is sitting in the camp after her partner has tapped out and they bring her a new partner. Don walks into camp with a penis implant. His dick is hanging down below his knees and immediately he starts berating and belittling her for her lack of survivor skills with an all knowing smile . ….you get the picture!
    In my opinion Don’s lack of actual survivor skills were offset by his positive attitude and his ability to turn “book smarts” into practical common sense smarts” He also showed amazing restraint dealing with Amber. By the time the show was over I was very proud of Don and his inner strength.. If I was in a tough situation I would feel confident with Don watching my back.
    I’m not nearly as polite and forgiving like Don was with Amber.
    This goes for both the episodes I watched with Amber in them…… If Amber and I were in a real life survivor situation it wouldn’t have taken long for me to start looking at her as protein because that’s all she would be good for.

    • Well put Brock, hilarious. Amber sure has some serious issues, and by the way so does this “new” format for Kellie’s blog….liked the old one better.

      • Sorry Ken,
        The site is undergoing a redesign, so things may look a bit goofy for a day or two while our web folks clean things up and hunt for the bugs that will undoubtedly pop up. Aaah, technology!

        • Kellie. It is the same with everything connected with “show business.” It isn’t the technology that is the enemy; it is the egos of the principals who feel they must put a personal imprint on everything. This season of N&A is and example. Metal Flowers (aptly abbreviated MF) starts tinkering and playing with what was “good enough” locations, personnel and format to produce the dreadful season just finished.

          • J.C. it appears that the MFer’s have been tinkering with this site since any 12 year old could have sorted it out in two days. Four days in and nothing….Nice to see Don Posting here, what a delightful chap, smart, determined, resourceful and calm. What a nice change from the usual ineptitude of MF.

  8. What the heck was the brown bottle that was shown a couple of times by Dons shelter? My only guess is that he was given some amenities by the producers while waiting for his new partner? This has been bothering me for days (I recorded the episode and just watched it the other day).

    • Chris, you are eagle-eyed! I missed the brown bottle, but my guess is that the show gave him food and water until they could get Amber to the location.

    • Chris, Amber found that bottle under some silt next to our camp. It was an old Windhoek Pislner bottle. You couldn’t believe how happy Amber and I were to find it. We talked about it a lot while in Namibia. It was the hardest thing in the environment we found. There are no stones in the Kalahari, so the bottle was able to help us do dozens of task, from playing music to scraping plant materials. Truly a gift from the gods. To bad the story of the bottle didn’t make the cut.

  9. Kellie. You mentioned last year’s XL cast were “characters” that made “good TV.” Well it didn’t make a good survival show which is the advertised theme. There were 11 odd balls and Dani J. in XL. Dani J. asked “What’s wrong with you people?” Indeed, from the psycho babbling Eva to the overblown egos of Jeff and EJ they made “good TV” but didn’t show much as human beings or teammates. The “pity caiman” caught by Laura at the end was an obvious a fake.
    I have higher hopes for the XL 2 crew! One reservation about Clarence; please don’t sing Clarence.

    • My thoughts exactly. Clarence making “a wild card” to be “fascinating tv”? We were hoping for N&A to be fascinating and interesting survival tv, not another fricking episode of UnReal.

  10. I just think it’s funny that Amber actually patrols the internet looking for stuff strangers write about her. As for the torn implant, I have implants and I know for a fact that you cannot feel liquid coming out of your implant if it ruptures. If she has saline it would have been flat in about 48 hours!! Silicone doesn’t leak in a way that is even noticeable. I like how miss “I’m in the military” has nothing but excuses for why she fails everytime she does this challenge. What did she even do in the military?? Make the coffee?

    • I agree. She might well have ruptured her implant weeks before entering the jungle and blamed it on N&A. It would be like her to do that. And, as I mentioned in my post below, she seems to have an excuse for everything. Her girlfriend had to post as well in order to back up her whining. It’s like we don’t have enough pissing and moaning from the participants to contend with.

  11. Kelly,
    You should really consider your day job, that was the best lie I have ever read.
    Also I built the shelter teaching him how to, also that fishing net was mine I made it for him to catch fish when I left. Also you must be one of those that believes what you watch on tv, that’s sad but good luck. Also if your gonna write and keep people updated you should write the correct actual events. Thank you
    Amber Hargrove

    • FYI I had surgery two weeks after I got home I tore my armpit muscle moving all the firewood because my partner didn’t like chores. He is super intelligent but needed survival skills, after I hurt myself moving the logs I knew I had to build something for my partner to get food so created my fish net out of wild sage, (I actually have survival skills) the producer held me against my will for two days my implant was in my armpit, so there’s the truth I really don’t care about fame I’m actually a very caring person you can ask my partner. But for all the haters after this experience I will or tell anyone going on this show…good luck.
      -Amber Hargrove

      • So really, to be fair Amber, Kellie has the same access to facts the rest of us do. She gets to experience the episode that’s aired. She doesn’t get to sit on set (because, that’s what it is even though it looks like the ‘wild’ places). You have to admit the editing didn’t show you in a good light in this episode, oh wait, you really weren’t shown in much of a good light in your previous failure either. So we can ask your partner about how “caring” you are? Really? the guy who you completely dissed from day one. Your attitude towards teamwork and cooperation was “No, I’m not doing that”. You hurt your “arm pit” muscle moving firewood? Wow, impressive. Well, we know he was intelligent, he doesn’t lack survival skills either and made a beautiful fish trap. Let’s see what did you catch? How much “meat” did you bring to the table? Zip, according to the show. What did you do that was shown on camera? Not much really. What we saw of you was somebody pissing and moaning, complaining and sitting. It appeared that you were the one that didn’t like chores. That may not have been the way it was but that’s what was shown. OBTW, you let them “hold you against your will”? No shit? That’s, under the law, kidnapping.

        • KenO. Right on! We saw Don build a fish trap from an illustration he had seen in the Boy Scout Manual. We saw no one build the shelter.We saw Amber carrying sage stems after a dumb argument. We saw Amber stripping leaves from the stems. We saw Amber bickering and sniping (a lot). Her Bio says Amber is married. The”me too” testimonials of Felicia indicates she is Amber’s partner which make her testimonials suspect? The Producers kidnapped Amber (held me 2 days against my will)? WTF? The good thing is that we won’t see Amber again!

          • HaHa, you picked up on the “partner” term better than I did J.C. I was put off the track by Amber using the “partner” term with Don. But I think you nailed it. Nothing like having your girl friend jump in to defend your “honor” against a bunch of male fans of the show. I picked up on it later, see below…

      • Amber, if I had been out there with you it would have been a totally different experience. I would have done all the heavy lifting and let you choose what tasks you wanted to perform.

        Ray

    • Kellie,
      I hope you’re not paying any attention to this. Your recaps crack me up and they are right on the money.

      • Steve, Kellie is very astute and I guarantee she’s aware of everything that’s exposed on her blogs. Sometimes some things are just not worth commenting on and I’m glad she leaves it up to us as we’re plenty capable.

    • HaHa, at least Kellie has a day job. What’s your day job? Can you get anyone to hire you? What were your job qualifications in the military? Pissing and Moaning? Making excuses? Or was it advanced DADT, oops, and you failed?

  12. “Naked and Afraid Season 5 Episode 12- 23 Days” was somewhat hard to watch for me. Once again, it was the WOMEN who brought the ugliness to the program. Holly just didn’t have her head in the game from jump street. HERE, TAKE THIS 15 MINUTES OF FAME AND GO HOME!!
    Seriously, Amber!! What was the show’s producer thinking?? Right out the starting block she “tried” to take-over. The minute I saw her walking up on day one, “I” WOULD HAVE TAPPED OUT. Naked and Afraid is no place for a um – – (I’ll be nice) person like her. AND SERIOUSLY!! YOUR IMPLANT IS LEAKING!!! She had all night to come up with that one!! GIVE her the 15 minutes of TV time and SEND HER HOME!!
    Don’t get me wrong. Don had his short comings too. But he was “trying” to solidify the “partnership” with both of these “nothings” during the short time they were there. My hat goes off to Don’s interest in that environment before the actual experience of Namibia (he knew what to look for while there).

  13. Kellie,
    Less than half this season’s episodes were even passable.
    Speaking of personnel and being positive and charitable: Tawny, Angel, Matt Wright, Aaron, Kacie, Jamie, Steven and Charlese resembled survivalists. I am giving Greg and Cassie a pass due to the numbing and relentless cold they endured. Stacey also gets a pass because she “burned out” by her careless partner.
    The “thousands” of applicants is a big lie because many of the selections are “bottom of the barrel” scrapings.
    Do you think this will be the last of N&A as a 2 person show???? This season points to a dying show that is FUBAR.

    • She didn’t get burn by her careless partner… It was an accident. Instead of sleeping next to the fire (In the middle of the day), she should have been keeping an eye on the water while her partner was out working his ass off. The water was for both of them remember…

      • Anyone with any experience with cooking over a campfire would have seen the pot falling off a mile away. Her partner was both careless and stupid. I agree she shouldn’t have been sleeping next to the campfire but sleep deprivation is one of the obstacles N&A participants have to contend with so sleeping in the middle of the day isn’t a problem. Meanwhile the moron was not working his ass off, more like ‘strolling’ his ass off while accomplishing nothing, zero, nada, zip. He’s a loser who never acknowledged just how ignorant and careless he was.

      • Stacey was sleeping with her back to the fire when Lee put the pot full of water on to boil. You imply it was her fault; it wasn’t.

    • I would give them both big fat goose eggs. To those in the “They deserve some credit for showing up.” I say absolutely not. A swollen implant, aka hypochondria, deserves no credit. As a female Army veteran I can only say Ms. “I want a second chance…to tap out and make my entire gender and female soldiers in particular look bad” is the wimpiest excuse for a woman I have ever seen, aside from Holly. At least Holly had the basic minimal human decency not to evacuate her bowels in the middle of camp.

      Given the clear psychological issues of so many of this season’s females I can only assume they are either NOT psychologically screened in any meaningful way OR if they are, the ones with ‘issues’ are intentionally chosen in many cases to provide ‘color’ for the show…and to balance the blatant a-holery of so many of the traditional/conservative males on a show which tends to be more than a tad sexist in the mistaken belief that their audience consists mainly of the above-mentioned male archetype.

      I have disabling MS and major service related disabilities and I could out-perform many of these weak and whining women…and I’m pushing 60 years old.

      “I can’t help build a shelter, my fake boob hurts.” SERIOUSLY? She wouldn’t last an HOUR in my body.

      • Michelle you are spot on. It seems most of the men are misogynistic morons with only a few that genuinely cared about their partners. Especially the idiots who wouldn’t “snuggle” with their partners for warmth, what idiots. I’ll also have to go with the “intentionally chosen” for the drama. Ever seen the show “UnREAL”? I think it’s exactly like that. By the way it appears that N&A producers have created their own reality show on how the locations are chosen. That’ll be a hoot, watch the spin.

      • Michelle- I just laughed out loud at your comment “Swollen implant, aka hypochondria”!!! I needed that! There have been many good participants on this show, and it’s too bad that the stinkers stick out.

        • Oh, I don’t know if the word is “many” Kellie. I’m going to have to go with J.C.’s observation that less than half of this seasons participants were even passable and less than that were actually ‘survivalists’. Pretty poor vetting over all and even less credible selection of locations. Sorry, sad but true. The only thing good about N&A is Kellie’s recaps.

      • Can you imagine how Amber would have berated Don if he would have had a penis implant. He as well as all of us would have never heard the end of it. If I was her partner within a few days of listening to her I would have eaten her(minus the implants) starting with her tongue. If you are who you say you are I commend you for your service as well as being a woman who isn’t afraid to call bull shit of another woman.

        • Michelle,
          Me again, the exact opposite for Don. I admired him! With his minimal actual survival skills he persevered. He had the right attitude for dealing with adversity.. always seeing the beauty and positive things around him. I also thought he showed amazing restraint dealing with that condescending bitch he was partnered with. I’m also a 65 year old vet.1968-1970. I Spent 15 years in the logging business 6 of them on a remote island in S.E Alaska 50 minutes by plane from the nearest town so I know a little about being in the elements day in and day out. If Amber would have been in a position of authority in Viet Nam and conducted herself in that manner she may have suffered consequences.

  14. Wow! Lot’s of fun and games here! However, it was not fun to watch 2 tap outs and one of the dumbest arguments ever filmed. Don said: “you are bigger than me and should carry more.” dumb ass statement. For men and women of a given weight, a man is 30% stronger-Even Don the “Scarecrow.” Don is reflecting his culture in which women are only “beasts of burden and breeders.” Sadly, Amber is such a “control freak” she cannot get along with a partner for any length of time. Holly; the wannabe cop, well that carries a syndrome within itself. To Don’s credit, he studied plants of the area and was able to forage some food. The place was alive with small game and birds; our hero got none of them nor did he even try to get them (if he did it was not shown on the edited show). Some survivalist! All these sites in Namibia are good ones (plenty of food, shelter materials, and water) and superior to the jungle environments so favored by the location crews.

    • I have no idea why Don didn’t hunt game for food. I do know that successful hunting and trapping animals is only acquired after lots of experience. The are very few on N&A who have shown any hunting skills (Darrin, Ryan and Steven are exceptions).

  15. OK, I’ve had breakfast and watched the episode, which was painful to watch. Both the women were wimpy losers. US Army Instructor? Please, this woman was a useless whiner, full of excuses and no skill whatsoever. Holly? Jesus why even go on the program girl. OK so now on to the really depressing parts which was M/F’s choice of Clarence (the garbage man), maybe they intend to pair him with Jake Nodar (who sets off my “gaydar” worse than Clarence, what a team they’d make. Surely they would spoon to relieve the cold). It’s getting so bad with N&A that reading Kellie’s recap is more exciting and informative than watching the episode which appears to be continuous replay of losers. Kind of the perfect ending of a season full of miserably inept participants and poorly sourced venues. I hope next season N&A is blessed with a different team than Metal Flowers.

    • KenO. Jake is “gay” and he says so. I could care less. He has good skills and is a hard and steady worker.

      • Normally I don’t mind gay people at all. What bothers me is gay men (especially) that try to butch up so that no one knows they’re gay then mistreat women for the same reason because they think its so tough. I reviewed the Season 5 episode 3 to feel a bit more confident about commenting on Jake. I don’t see him having much in the area of real skills. He killed nothing, he trapped nothing, he bitched like a little girl and didn’t have the decency to keep his little waif warm with his big body and then criticized her every day. He looked scared to death about even touching her. I view him as a condescending asshole, more mouth about skills (“I’m going to make the Amazon my bitch”and “If it moves I’ll kill it and then eat it”, how many times have we heard that?). I wasn’t too imprfessed with his shelter building skills either. He was exactly the prototype gay guy that huffs and puffs but can’t do much. Body builders are like that too and a lot of them are gay as well.

        • KenO. Agree about Jake’s ugly boasting of his prowess; a condescending mouth is never an asset. A legend in his own mind and it is not limited to gay men; we have seen many of them on N&A. Women too!

          • You’re right about it not being limited to gay men but it does seem to be a very prevalent trait with them. Arrogance is another. Why this is true I don’t know but I’ve known many gay men and, yes, it’s true. Just as it’s true that gay women are typically (not always but typically) rude and dismissive towards men.

    • While I agree with your assessments of Holly (I am psychologically unfit to be this far from my nail lady) and ‘Army Instructor’ (certainly not in anything requiring physical effort, any kind of interpersonal cooperation or basic human courtesy and hygiene, though she WOULD be on extended latrine duty after the disgusting and inconsiderate stunt she pulled were she under my command). HILARIOUS she had self-diagnosed dysentery after one cowflop stool, even though she was walking around, with much encouragement, and had already moved on to her next pseudo diagnosis of ruptured implant (highly unlikely even though I’m sure she did miss her cool-foam mattress). **massive eye roll**
      As for the culture assessment, I saw little evidence that he was anything but American if a little snarky. Sounded to me like he was sick unto death of her diatribes about her superiority and wanted her to show him rather than rant at him.

      As for your “anti-gay” (ahem) sentiments, you can live a lie and hate those who don’t all you wish but it won’t change how you were born.

      • What’s your point? Gay people are born that way, they wind up spending a life being taunted, harassed, bullied and hurt. It affects them and for many it makes them very sour towards the rest of us. I don’t have to accept their ill treatment of others or like it. Does that mean I don’t have some empathy for them? No it doesn’t but I won’t let their bullshit slide either.

      • Amber did bust her boob! I was there for her doctors appointments and surgery! Oh and Discovery paid for her surgery. Grow up! The first time she was one the show she had parasites because of the apple snails. I watched her in so much pain and so sick
        She could barely walk! Facts! Mind your business if you do not know. Have a good day!

      • Amber did bust her boob! The muscle did tear. She had to wait for some scar tissue to build. I was there for her appointments and surgery! Oh and Discovery paid for her surgery. Grow up! The first time she was one the show she had parasites because of the apple snails. I watched her in so much pain and being so sick
        She could barely walk for months! Facts! Mind your business if you do not know. Have a good day!

        • Wow, “bust her boob”, with jargon like that you must be a medical expert. She tore a muscle moving firewood? Wow, that would be some serious muscle tone there. She had parasites, she “busted her boob”, she did all the work because her partner was lazy……she seems to have an excuse for everything. Discovery paid for her surgery? Say, I’m not sure her implant was actually ruptured on the show, maybe she ruptured it before the show and it started to bother her during the show, who knows? Tough Army chick needs implants to get/keep dates? You must be pretty intimate with her to know all this.

  16. OH no, they picked, out of all the really qualified men, Clarence? There goes the last bit of respect I had for Metal Flowers, respect I had been losing nearly every episode this season. I guess that proves the comment made on “UnReal” that “We don’t solve problems, we create them and then film them” is accurate. What could have been a genuinely delightful series has now proven to have been merely slog and lies. How dreadful. I haven’t even watched this episode as Deb and I record the episode then watch it as we eat a hearty breakfast. That two participants tapped out early shows how miserably the M/F’s select participants, interesting that Metal Flowers abbreviation also stands for, ah, well, you know. However I would have bet Holly was going to tap out early since she already has a cops mentality, hope she makes it through the Police academy. Cops don’t do well in “survival” situations unless they can shoot something.

    • Agree about Clarence. I wonder if they picked him because it is easier to film a fat man sitting than someone who is moving around hunting and foraging.

      • It’s very possible he was on the bottom of the list of men willing and able to come back for the new challenge. Not everybody wants to do it again, but he is homeless and has more time available to him.

        • Nobody knows how they pick anybody. It’s an enigma. It’s certainly not for their skills.

          • I’m hoping that Clarence was selected just to be the season’s wild card. I hope that his Alana Barfield- mentality of “Survival is Lazy” will change once he has a partner who lasts more than a few days. If he’s paired with a man like Darrin (who has the energy of a toddler), Clarence may up his game.

            Last year’s XL season had several characters who would have been horrible to survive with, but who made for fascinating TV. Honora was a loon, but every time she was on screen, I knew that I was about to see something memorable.

      • Honestly, I think a lot of the contestants sit around, or more usually lay around, in order to conserve energy. If I had to pick a “team” from the episodes I’ve seen, Clarence would definitely be a first round consideration. He didn’t spend a lot of time flapping his gums to tell people he knew what he was doing. Instead, he found water, food, built a shelter, etc … and just sat back and enjoyed the ride. His only drawback is that I think he has some psychological issues which get in the way of working in any kind of a team capacity. He says at the end of his episode that he’s tired of “lone wolfing it” but I don’t think that’s something that someone just decides to change overnight. So they probably put him in XL thinking it would be fun to watch what happens (the look he shot his partner when she accidentally burned down his debris hut was priceless)

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