At the end of last week’s episode of Fargo, we knew what was coming. Even Ed (Jesse Plemons) and Peggy (Kirsten Dunst) knew what was coming. It was the police, looking for Ed after a guy rose up from the ashes of Bud’s Butcher Shop with a meat cleaver buried in his head.
So really, it’s no surprise that “Rhinoceros” kicks off with Ed getting arrested. Peggy doesn’t seem too happy about it, which makes sense. All of this is 100-percent her fault. Hank (Ted Danson) holds her back, while Peggy proclaims Ed’s innocence. Lou knows better. We all do.
Lou takes Ed into the station, where Betsy (Cristin Milioti) is waiting. She’s worried about her husband and wants to help. He asks her to take Noreen (Emily Haine) home. Lou definitely has a lot less sympathy for Ed.
On another side of the station, Charlie (Allan Dobrescu) gets summoned to make his one phone call. Obviously, Bear (Angus Sampson) doesn’t know where he is or he wouldn’t be sitting on the porch with Otto (Michael Hogan). Bear can be hard to understand in more ways than one. He’s such a mumbly low-talker. This time, it’s pretty clear that he’s talking about Elron, the eldest Gerhardt brother, who was killed in the Korean War. He wonders how Elron would have handled the Gerhardt’s current situation. He seems to think he’d do a lot better of a job than Dodd (Jeffrey Donovan). Just then, Dodd rolls up and Simone (Rachel Keller) comes out to get Bear to accept Charlie’s call.
Simone kisses Otto on the head before he goes back in. This triggers something in Dodd. “I get it, you don’t have respect for anything,” he says. “Do you know what a whore’s life is?” Wait, what did she do that was so horrible??
Dodd, on the other hand, did something horrible. Well, not just one thing, but the most recent is that he sent Charlie out to kill Ed, “the Butcher of Luverne.” Bear finds out, tackles Dodd off the porch and starts beating the crap out of him. Simone doesn’t look too sad about that. Can’t say I blame her.
Before it gets too out of hand, Hanzee (Zahn McClarnon) shows up with a shotgun. He points it at Bear and tells him to stop. Dodd then tells him he’s getting “the belt.” He offers Bear the option of getting beat with the strap or the buckle. Bear chooses the latter, but Floyd (Jean Smart) stops the insanity before it spreads any further.
Well, she stops the insanity before it spreads any further on the Gerhardt’s lawn. Down at the police station may be a different story. Floyd tells Bear to take care of Charlie, while she instructs Dodd to get “the Butcher.”
Simone has her own message — for Mike Milligan (Bokeem Woodbine). She’s upset about Dodd calling her a whore. Mike says, “Well, technically …” Ha! She then tells Mike that Bear and Dodd are headed to Luverne. More importantly, she tells Mike he’s going to kill Dodd for her. Mike asks if she has any last words for the guy. “Yeah,” she says. “Tell him, ‘Kiss my grits.'” Not exactly famous last words (unless your name is Flo) and not exactly a smart move.
Mike hangs up the phone and begins reciting Jabberwocky by Lewis Carroll as he and the remaining mafia members prepare to leave. Oh yah … something is about to go down.
It’s funny that the “massacre” that Lou talks about in Season 1 takes place at the same location of the seminar. It’s even funnier that Peggy still plans to go to the seminar with her husband in jail for murder. Hank thinks that seems like an insane idea, given the number of bodies that have been piling up over the last few days. Hey, maybe he doesn’t know that the seminar is non-refundable.
In between all of Peggy’s ramblings about the future, Hank gets a word in to tell her that they have a forensics team coming in the morning to check out her car. She says they need permission, but the cops already got it from Sonny (Dan Beirne), the mechanic she sold it to for just $700. He then asks her to tell him the real story.
Lou is trying to get the same thing out of Ed down at the police station. Ed seems to be sticking with his “you’re all crazy” story. He then starts talking about Noreen’s book. “By which, I guess I’m saying is, no matter what they throw at me, I’m going to take care of what’s mine,” he says.
Lou tries to convince Ed that the Gerhardts aren’t going to rest until he’s dead, and possibly Peggy, too. Ed asks for a lawyer. He says if a lawyer tells him to talk, he’ll talk.
Lou seems to know just the right lawyer. In walks Karl Weathers (Nick Offerman). Or at least, in stumbles Karl Weathers.
Hank is trying to figure out why Peggy wouldn’t stop after hitting Rye Gerhardt with her car. She doesn’t really say or admit her guilt, but instead starts talking about how if she had to run, she wouldn’t look back. She talks about how Ed grew up in their current house and her collection of fashion magazines. “I’m living in a museum of the past,” she says.
Just then, lights appear in the window. Hank goes to the front porch to find three Gerhardt vehicles. He tells Peggy to hide and not come out, no matter what she hears. Dodd has his cattle prod drawn (and sparking!), asking for Ed. As Hank explains that Ed was taken to the station, Hanzee goes around the side of the house with that familiar shotgun. Dodd says Hank must think he’s stupid. “Son, I could fill a steamer trunk with the amount of stupid I think you are,” Hank says. “But no, that’s where he went.”
Dodd and his men approach the house and just as Hank is about to pull his gun, Hanzee knocks him out cold with the butt of his shotgun. Dodd sends Hanzee off to the station, but stays behind with two other men to check out the house. The trio goes into the basement, which looks like a scene out of Hoarders. Wowee, Peggy’s got quite a magazine collection!
As the guys make their way around the ginormous stacks of paper, a crash is heard and one guy starts wincing in pain. Peggy knocked him out with a sink! Dodd starts telling him to pipe down and gets startled by a noise. He turns and shoots his other man dead. Now Dodd is left alone — and Peggy is a bit of a psycho, dontchaknow. Dodd continues his search, but puts down that cattle prod, which Peggy scoops up and uses to shock him repeatedly.
Back at the Gerhardt house, Floyd feeds Otto as she asks Simone, “Are you with us?” The girl tries to reassure her grandmother, but Floyd tells her that she needs to be a leader. However, the heart-to-heart is ruined by a hail of gunfire. Mike Milligan, Gale Kitchen (Brad Mann) and the rest of the mafia are outside, making Swiss cheese of the Gerhardt home.
At the police station, Karl Weathers stumbles in just as loudly as he is rambling. He meets with Ed, but confuses him with his line of questioning. As Karl goes to leave, he’s greeted by Bear and several other members of the Gerhardt family, as well as their shotguns. However, Bear isn’t looking for Ed. He just wants Charlie. Well, until Lou blabs that Ed is on the premises.
Hanzee knows. He knows everything. He’s about to take a shot at Ed’s head from outside, when a cop draws the shades.
Bear seems to be willing to let Ed go for now. He just wants his baby boy. Lou enlists Karl to take on Charlie’s case and talk to Bear. However, this is just a distraction, so he can get Ed safely out of the station.
Hank wakes up on the Blumquist porch, with one heck of a headache and a call on the radio. He needs a second to catch his breath, but he’ll be the first backup to the station. “Tell Lou to sit tight,” Hank says over the radio. “I can’t have him getting killed without me. I’ll never hear the end of it at dinner.”
Meanwhile, Bear and the boys are getting ready to storm the station, when Karl comes out. He says as Charlie’s lawyer, he needs to tells him that Bear is making it worse for Charlie. Karl convinces Bear and his boys to leave. At this point, Lou and Ed are long gone, but Hanzee is right behind them.
Hanzee tracks Ed and Lou through the woods, but not fast enough. Hank pulls up to find the two on the side of the road. Ed takes off on foot (bad move), but Lou gets into the car. Just as the two drive off, Hanzee comes out of the woods and heads into the direction of Ed’s house.
It may seem like the episode is over, but make sure to stay through the credits. First of all, it features a version of “Man of Constant Sorrow,” well known for its role in the Coen Brothers’ O Brother, Where Art Thou? However, there are also a few little snippets of Karl and Sonny at the VFW. Don’t touch that remote!
While you wait for those exchanges, think about this: Is Dodd dead? What about Floyd? I can’t imagine either Gerhardt is going out like that. I could see Otto or even Simone as a casualty, but could such evil be taken out so quickly? I doubt it. Also, I have to wonder why Hank didn’t check on Peggy once he woke up on the porch. Maybe she was already gone. Hopefully, she will find Ed before Hanzee does. See you next week!
New episodes of Fargo premiere Monday nights at 10/9CT on FX.