17 days ago, 12 Naked and Afraid headed in to the unforgiving Colombian badlands. Now, 10 survivalists remain.
In El Bosque, Shane has separated himself from his teammates Alana and Danielle. Danielle is rocking an awesome hat and the ladies are enjoying a successful fruit harvest. The women refer to Shane as “The weird neighbor,” and now that Shane (and their camp’s tension) is gone, they are trying their luck with fish baskets.
Loner Shane seems to be enjoying his solitude too. He’s fashioned a spear and is on a walkabout in hint of the elusive capybara that has been seen around camp. But, the large rodent proves elusive.
Alana’s clever fishing method is fruitful and she catches a fish! And since Danielle is a vegetarian, the fish is all hers.
Over in Roca Diablo, EJ and Jeff are out of food. They’ve decided to walk 13 miles across the savanna to Piranha Lake to find food. In preparation, EJ has made a carrying pack to take a few barrel cacti with them and before heading into the unknown, and devout Jeff prays for protection and protein.
Chris and Luke find a grove of mangos and they fill their packs with the vitamin-rich fruit. And in the process, tree-climbing Chris gets his fanny, literally eaten by ants. But the foraging is “Fruitful” and now they can add a bunch of mangos to their cache of food. Full bellies makes survivalists giddy and before long, they start riffing about their jungle riches, calling themselves “Jungle Ballers” and calling their experience, “Sur-thriving.” Team Bromance is rolling in fruit.
Shane, who is anemic, is desperate for iron. He goes on a nighttime hunt in search of the meet that has eluded him. But in the night, he encounters a coral snake and thankfully isn’t bitten. It’s a near miss.
In Lady Land, Eva, Dani and Laura have decided that their camp lacks the resources that they need to survive. They’ve only eaten minnows and lizards and need plant resources. (They’re lucky to have eaten so much protein!) They decide to head over to Chris and Luke’s camp in Cano Verde, take a look around, and regroup.
Over in Cano Verde, Luke teaches Luke how to do yoga. Naked Yoga. The turtle strolls across screen to the dulcet tones of a flute. Their camp is so fun: who would expect that a survival situation would include naked bro-ga?
After they finish their stretching session, the ladies stroll into camp. The men are happy to see three beautiful naked women walk into camp, but three more hungry mouths might deplete their limited resources.
The women are sick of protein and the men are hungry for meat, so they decide that as long as everyone is positive and willing to work, the women are welcome to stay. The men treat the women with hot mangos (which sounds delicious) and the ladies are excited to help provide protein.
EJ and Jeff are suffering in the savanna. After 6 hours of treacherous trekking, they are only halfway to the lake. They find a bat-filled cave and make camp for the night.
In Cano Verde, Team Bromance has morphed into “Team Nuts and Butts.” The five survivors lolling in a pile looks like a pride of lions.
That night, something large runs through camp. Does anyone have an idea of what it could be? The night vision camera only catches the briefest of shots, and it looks to me to be housecat-sized animal. Regardless, I’d be mega-freaked out to see any critter meander across my sleeping form.
Over in El Bosque, Shane is still hungry. His teammates are talking trash about him when he walks up. Shane asks Alana for help fishing and she tells him that they don’t need his help. He borrows their fire starter (Why not dip a stick in their fire?) and struggles to build a fire.
Shane goes over to his teammates and asks them to work with him. The women are really mean and they’re giving him back some of the attitude that he gave to them. The conversation does not go well and Shane cries in the forest, alone. As thunder claps overhead, he prays for help, and it’s heartbreaking. He is a person who really needs to find a compassionate person who deems him worthy of love. I hope he finds Jeff and EJ, I hope that Jeff is the kind of person who could envelop Shane in a cloak of friendship.
Since Shane still has no fire, his only option to stay warm is to march in place all night long. It’s so sad.
When morning breaks, EJ and Jeff resume their hike across the savannah. And over in his camp, Shane is so chilly from his cold night hat he heads out to the savannah to get some warmth in his body. It’s a moment of kismet when EJ and Jeff see and call out to Shane. And I admit to shedding a happy tear or two. Shane’s this season’s underdog; how can you not root for him?
The season-long XLR is the survival rating of the team, which fluctuates as the teams find success and failure. In the fourth episode, the team’s scores are as follows:
The gamble to move from Roca Diablo has raised EJ and Jeff’s PSR from 7.1 to 7.6 out of 10.0
Combining forces raises Eva, Laura & Dani’s PSR 7.7 to 8.2 out of 10.0 and Luke and Chris’ PSR also rises from 7.0 to 8.2 out of 10.0
Continued dysfunction keeps Danielle, Alana & Shane’s PSR falling from 6.9 to 5.8 out of 10.0
Now that EJ and Jeff have met Shane, Shane’s attitude is much improved. His spirit is overjoyed. Shane wants to leave with EJ and Jeff. EJ and Jeff aren’t too sure they need a third. The ladies crash the men’s pool party and the drama between Shane, Alana and Danielle is palpable. And EJ and Jeff don’t do drama.
Hakim: Magic ninja blade
EJ: Cooking Pot
Laura: Bow Drill kit
Dani: Mosquito net
Luke: Water Bottle
Chris: fishing kit (Lost)
Honora: Bow Drill kit (Broken)
Danielle: Fire Starter
Shane: Metal Canteen
My thoughts after week 4 —
I like the idea of the combined team of “Team Nuts and Butts.” I think that Dani, Laura and Eva bring great resources that can help make Luke and Chris’ camp a paradise! Soon everyone’ll be doing naked yoga!
I really don’t like the way that Danielle and Alana are treating Shane. He was a weirdo towards them, but their actions are borderline vindictive. I know that editing can make even the most innocuous statements sound terrible, but the way they laugh at Shane’s misery is really mean.
EJ and Jeff were pretty ballsy to leave their camp and hike across the savanna. Had they not found Shane and his awesome water source, the walk could have proven fatal.
Does anyone know what Alana brought as her survival item?
To be continued…
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