Dance Moms Seeing Stars recap: Corn, beef, (re)hash

dance-moms-seeing-stars-melissa-deaf Lori Acken

Time for another reunion show, Dance Moms nation, this one called “Seeing Stars” since we used up “Playing Favorites” on last time’s and “Enough About the Videos, Already!” was apparently not an option.

JC, Executive Producer Superstar, is still apparently copping to the title and he starts us out by reminding us that we’re all packing up and moving to L.A. so tonight’s festivities will serve as a fond farewell to Pittsburgh.

Except when he introduces Abby, she promptly says that we are not either leaving Pittsburgh. We’re expanding. Making a place to which the Pittsburgh kids can migrate, if you will.

(Also, though we’re wearing understated black this evening, someone‘s Big Hair has reached a bold new altitude. Because I know you’d want to know.)

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With that bit of old news handled, let’s jump right in and pick on Holly. Abby says that she must be taking bad-attitude privates from Christi. Also everyone else is just jealous of Maddie, but that’s what makes the team good.

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You dig?

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JC digs. Or thinks you’re nuts. Hard to tell really.

Let’s bring out Holly and see how she feels about it.

Dr. Holly is calm as a puddle. She says Abby is delusional about what she’ll admit to saying and then we see clips of Abby being delusional about what she says. Then Abby outright admits that when she has a dispute with an adult she goes after the child instead. (First step to recovery is admitting it, dear. But I think I’ve said this about 37 times before, so maybe not.)

Abby says that is her modus because the child is her student and children ultimately know the truth, so … er, that. I suspect that logic is not going to be our very special guest this evening.

JC asks if Abby really meant what she said about her planning on only Maddie and Mackenzie getting work. Abby says the photographer she was talking to was from Pittsburgh and she’s known her for many years. JC says that doesn’t answer the question. The audience laughs. Holly says, for God’s sake, woman, at least own your tragic flaws.

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Abby says nothing.

JC wants to know if there is any mending fences for these two. Holly says yes, if Abby treats Nia with the same respect that she does the other children. Abby offers a snippy no. Oooooooooooh! says the audience. But Abby’s not punishing Holly, mind you. She just doesn’t want to play with her (her words, not mine) and so there and phhhllllltttttt. Holly says something about breaking toys in a sandbox.

Because JC has officially lost his marbles, he picks now to ask Holly for some of her favorite memories of ALDC Pittsburgh. Bless her heart, Holly offers some nice ones, which allows us to see this absolutely adorable blast from the Dance Moms past.

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Gah! Look how eensy peensy Nia is!

We see the girls celebrate Nia’s first trip to the top of the pyramid and the Maya Angelou solo and the Free At Last group dance. Abby looks puzzled by Holly’s good will. It’s fun, Abby. You should try it.

Then the girls do Stomp the Yard, inspired by Orange is the New Black, which the girls should not be watching under any circumstances. Like Carrie. Cool dance though. Must have happened during my sabbatical, because I don’t remember it. I’m glad I got to see it. I could watch it 100 times, in fact. Where are Kalani and Jo Jo?

When we come back, JC asks Holly about Jill and Melissa’s lack of backbone where Abby is concerned. Let’s bring them out and ask them about it. Jill says she’s not afraid of Abby …she’s afraid of the consequences if she doesn’t bend to Abby’s will. Same thing, says an incredulous Holly (and exhausted Lori). Melissa says Abby likes to rule the world and Melissa likes to be ruled and that’s just the way it goes.

We see a clip of Holly hysterically calling the other mothers cowards and then JC asks them if they, you know, are. Like they would say, “Oh you betcha!” JC, but way to move the storyline along. Melissa says she’s not a coward, she’s just, you know, grateful for opportunities and that’s how she shows it. Holly says that’s bull. Melissa retorts that Holly thinks Melissa and Jill and their kids are uneducated and “simple.” And she even said it to Nia. Jill heard her do it. Ain’t that right, Jill?

Well, maybe she didn’t say it exactly like that.
She didn’t? Because I just said you said she did … on TV.

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Jill would prefer not to get into it, thanks. The others would. Holly especially. Yelling. Yelling.

Finally, Melissa says she is not a strong woman like Holly and she admits it so get off her silver, spangly ass. Abby says if Holly is so miserable, she can go elsewhere. Holly says she is not going elsewhere. Abby says then she should shut her mouth and let Abby rule the world. Holly is not going to do that, either.

Oh yay. Abby just said Holly “does not know her place as a woman.” What are you, Abby? Her husband from a past life? Say one in 1952? Or 1847? Happy to have finally gotten a rise, Abby nods vigorously at the truth of her words. Jill says Holly’s place is wherever Holly wants to be. Melissa nods, but studiously avoids eye contact with Abby or Holly or anything that has a pulse. Abby says screaming and yelling are not appropriate behavior. Backstage, Kira speaks for all of us and says Abby should take her own advice.

Holly tries to expound on the situation but Abby is not interested. She tries to dismiss Holly, but Holly says if Abby won’t take action as a manager, Holly will take action as a momager. That’s fine, says Abby. I refuse to look upon you any further, but fine.

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Since that was so enormously pleasant, let’s talk about the dueling videos, because that should improve the mood in the room. Jill says that all Holly did was yammer on and on about the Hollywood types who were working on Nia’s video and (throwing up her hands) “I had Abby Lee Miller. How am I supposed to complete with that?” The audience cracks up.

Get ’er, Abby! Get that bad, sassy Jill! Abby goes after … Holly. Same ol’ same ol’ about Nia not looking like herself and men in underpants and what have you. However shall Abby take her to Nickelodeon or Disney now? Same way you take Maddie — who is younger than Nia and shocked the planet in those Sia videos — Abby. Exact. Same. Way. With pride and enthusiasm.

Speaking of that, let’s have Melissa weigh in about whether or not there is a double standard at work here. Melissa makes her patented Many Faces of Denial and says well, it was only one grown man in underpants in Maddie’s video and besides, she’s not Maddie’s manager, so don’t look at her, man. Uh, you’re her mother, Toots. Mother trumps manager. And way to dodge the issue … and the double standard … and responsibility.

By the way … what are your favorite memories of Pittsburgh?

Oh, you know … the time I had the mall hair and mom jeans and worked at the front desk greeting cherubs.

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And back when Mackenzie and Vivi looked like this …

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And when Mackenzie had to do stuff like this because Maddie is Abby’s favorite and she is not.

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Good times.

Dance break. Freak Show. Bearded Kalani. Still no Jo Jo?

After break, Jess and Kira are onstage. Let’s pit them against each other and relive Kira’s “these for fwee and these for fwee!” moment. Kira says it wasn’t right to make fun but she only did it because she knew Jo Jo could take it. Under her breath (Microphone, dear. They catch everything.), Abby says some kids need to be made fun of. Asked to say that a little louder, she edits the statement to Jess has serious issues. Jess says she has no issues. Ok, well then Abby has issues. And here they are:

Jo Jo needs speech therapy.
Jo Jo needs shots.
Jo Jo needs a hearing test.
Jo Jo needs to go to school. For more than one semester.

Oopsie, Abby. Jo Jo actually skipped a grade. Oh. Well, she still can’t say her r’s even if she is Einstein in a straitjacket. Jess says that, because Abby has no kids of her own, she knows nothing about raising kids. Abby responds by screaming … in Melissa’s ear.

Jess calmly congratulates her on being the loudest person in the room. Abby screams in Melissa’s ear again. Oh. She’s pretending to be Jo Jo. Get it, Melissa? MELISSA?! Hold up two fingers if you can hear us.

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Let’s have a little reminder of  Jo Jo’s chutzpah. And another example of Abby’s double standards, this one for taking back talk. Mack, yes. Jo Jo, no. JC chalks it up to different parenting styles and moves on.

Even though Jill has behaved like a complete wack-a-doo for most of the season, she gets a pass on having to relive anything unpleasant (like last week’s camera incident) and gets to move right on to her favorite memories of Pittsburgh.

Well, there’s the time I did the ol’ vent-the-furnace dance while Abby got her nails did…

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When I had yellow mall hair and gray feathers….

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When Abby told a complete stranger that she “did it” on the 50 yard line. Holla!

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Fun!
Let’s have Jo Jo do the “Carrie” dance.

When we come back from commercial, we quiz Kira about having Abby as Kalani’s manager. Kira doesn’t really get how the whole deal works. Here. Let Jill break it down into one simple step for you: You need your kid to be seen with the ALDC kids. Boom. Done.

It is to laugh, says Kira. Kalani has worked with Marguerite Derricks. She doesn’t need Kendall or Maddie. She just loves Abby, so here Kira sits.

JC says let’s leave each other alone for a bit and talk about a common enemy — Cathy. Nahhhh, says the Pitt Crew. JC pushes on. She did score a win against them, after all. Scabs, all of the dancers, says Jill. Cathy just wants her Dance Moms paycheck, says Melissa.

And here comes our best friend now. With Mr. Megaphone. And corn. We get no explanation for the corn.

We keep Mrs. Stein safely in her own chair, just in case, and quiz her about the megaphone. Simple, says Cathy: Fight loud and obnoxious with loud and obnoxious. Then JC wants to know if she enjoys pushing Abby’s buttons. Best part of the competition, says Cathy.

The audience laughs. Abby says that’s just sad. Jill and Melissa agree. Button-pushing: 1. Abby: 0.

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We talk a little bit about last week’s The Patriot dance and its meaning and then Maddie dances All God’s Creatures.

When we come back from commercial, we get in a fight with JC about whether Ava was a real ALDC team member or not. Abby says Jeanette came crying to her about getting Ava on TV and she’s just a great big user. A big user who just so happens to be here to talk it over. Smooshing in beside Jill, the statuesque Jeanette says if anyone is using anyone, it is Abby riding Maddie’s coattails. Melissa doesn’t get it. Abby says how dare you. Jeanette dares her because she has fetched Abby Coney dogs (with mustard, notes Cathy) and cherry dipped ice cream cones and everything.

Yes, but are you a stalker, JC wants to know. Jeanette says she was told to go to things. By Santa, Abby wants to know? By you, retorts Jeanette. Santa has no response.

All the same, Jeanette says, Abby’s hurtful words have driven Ava to work harder to show Abby that she couldn’t keep her down. She tells a story about Ava reaching out for a hug from Abby and Abby ripping her ALDC jacket off instead and Melissa says that, yes, that was sad, but still. Ava wasn’t invited back and Jeanette brought her anyway. Abby may have torn the jacket off of Ava, but she was punishing Jeanette. Anyone feel better? Anybody?

Jeanette says the best revenge is to beat Abby’s dancers and she plans to continue doing so.

Let’s dance Frozen Together.

When we come back from commercial, Abby says the Pittsburgh location will remain in her possession and she still loves it like a firstborn. We also learn that the place is overrun with stinkbugs and that 18 — not 17, Cathy — of her kids have danced on Broadway.

Next we get a speech from Abby and a tender little montage of the children’s faces and long-ago dances and I miss the bejesus out of Chloe and Paige and Brooke and simpler times. JC asks if Cathy will head west to compete against the ALDC out there. Probably, says Mrs. Megaphone.

Then we hear about the ALDC’s globetrotting, Ireland first, then Australia. The entire team is going, but not everyone is included in every event, says Holly. Jeanette says she’s seen posters for some of the events with Nia’s face on it and then Nia’s face disappeared on later versions and we have a little disagreement about whether Nia is included or excluded. Cathy wants to know why Holly would “haul her cookies” down under for nothing.

Holly says if Abby doesn’t include Nia, they will make their own opportunities while there. And also if Abby doesn’t like that Nia is Holly’s mini-me, then she should not take her with because baby girl is  an extension of mama and that’s a proud thing.

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Since we had no real high notes thus far this season with which to salve the wounds, JC mumbles something about Los Angeles and calls it a day.

Next week on Dance Moms, everyone’s down under except passport-free Abby (or was it visa troubles?!!!), the Aussie press and dance community have no love for Abby, Kira and Melissa have drama and Kira experiences a brief nuclear moment.

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So what say you, Dance Moms nation? Snoozefest to the n-th degree? Did you miss the mega-glam dresses and hairdos of reunion shows past? Did you even watch the whole thing? What are you most looking forward to about the Thunder Down Under, since that at least looks interesting? Sound off in the comments section below.

Dance Moms Australia Special Part 1 premieres Tuesday, May 19 at 9/8CT on Lifetime. Part 2 debuts May 26 at 9/8CT.

 

31 Comments

  1. Hey Lori…don’t know if you heard but guess who won BIGGEST REALITY VILLAIN at the REALITY TV AWARDS (again I hear)…give you a hint…it’s a certain brunette dance instructor….

    • SPOILER ALERT! Maddie presented the award for Outstanding Judges on the Reality TV Awards. DWTS won, and Maddie announced that she and the man who accepted the award (whose name I don’t know) would be partnered together on next season’s DWTS, their goal being to win the Mirror Ball Award.

  2. Hi guys…yeah, I am still here. Still torturing myself watching this car wreck of a show. This one was an all time low. The dancing couldn’t even save it. There wasn’t enough of it. Remember when they let Brooke sing her song on the reunion show even though she was on her way out? Wouldn’t it have been cool to have both Nia and Kendall ‘sing’ their songs? I will never forget Brooke opening her mouth to sing and it coming out sounding like 4 people singing in not quite 4 part harmony. It reminded me of an old Addams family episode where Morticia’s sister had a brief career singing because she could sing harmony all by herself. I did really like Brooke’s writing, though. Especially her song about how much pain she was in, both emotionally and physically. Hope the pain is gone…and hope she is still dancing, too. It is a terrible thing how quickly the ability to dance well leaves you. Even someone as talented as she was. That is the sad thing. We lost Paige and Brooke and didn’t get a chance to follow up with them, whereas Chloe has her channel on YouTube and releases new video’s weekly. Sometimes dancing and sometimes fun video’s like ‘what’s in my dance bag?’ that are really cute and remind us that these girls are still 13 or younger. I think Kalani is 14 now. Still a baby. Watching that old footage made me miss Brooke and Paige and Chloe so much. Look at that still shot of the girls in split leaps. Look at the beauty of Brooke’s position and Chloe’s feet…even better than Maddie’s front foot. So sad that Abby would rather kill her dancer’s ability and love for dance than to let them have a career of their own. Like someone else wrote, ‘it’s Abby’s way or no way.’ So very sad. The fact that she has absolutely decided that Nia is out and so quickly and has already started doing things to her that it took whole seasons for her to do to the other girls. Just shows to go you how much more powerful she sees herself now. Before she used to have some compunctions about looking like the bad person, but now she revels in being horrible and insisting that she has been wronged. She knows that she was trying to sabotage Nia, yet somehow that has become Holly and Nia being ‘back stabbers.’ Abby will never ever forgive Holly or Nia for doing something successful without her (one of the things that Kelly and Brooke did, too). Abby is like an elephant. She never forgets and despite her always seeing herself on the high ground, she never forgives, either. Nia could literally beg her for forgiveness but Abby would never give it. Abby has already dismissed Nia in her mind and although she will grudgingly give Nia dances because she is contractually obligated to, she will always sit playing with her phone while Gia teaches and watches Nia. It is sickening. As for Kira and Kalani, it isn’t that Kalani loves Abby…it is that she loves being able to dance on TV and as long as she is on the show, she will be able to. Kalani was in the Matty B (or whatever it was) video, too but you don’t see her being cruelly treated like Nia is. I really hope that Nia is able to keep growing as a singer and dancing in the way that is best for her. I keep hoping and praying that this is the last season. I mean…where do we go from here? What would be the purpose of going on? Once Abby has her studio in CA up and running, will we continue to see the girls be castigated and then dismissed one by one (including Mackenzie) until all that is left is ‘The Maddie show’. How Abby can say that Nia’s video was inappropriate when it was tame compared to the Sia video with Maddie in the cage with an adult man dressed in very revealing, tight and wet shorts. At least the guys in Nia’s video are kind of hazy so that you can’t really see them clearly and are only brief flashes in the video. Kendall’s video was worse in that regard in my opinion, too, Kendall is way too young for the video images in her video, too. Abby is nuts and is wrong. Wrong Wrong WRONG!! She will cling to her wrong ideas and wrong way of doing things no matter what, though. I also heard that she was not well received in Australia. Maybe her not being present had more to do with that than with her supposedly losing her passport. I mean, how in the heck could she have gotten on the plane if she didn’t have a passport. Sheesh! Anyway, I actually hope that Holly can find something else wonderful for Nia to do while they are ‘down under.’ We will see…

    P.S. Cathy is horrible. She reminds me of a Harpy. She flies in, steals attention (rather than food) and then flies away only to come back again the next time attention is served up. Scary!

  3. Jeff, Abby and all the moms are a joke the show is fake and rigged. It just needs to be canceled. Lifetime should give Chole her own show. The fame the girls are experiencing is short lived and will not last. Abby is not manager or agent she is joke. And lifetime and Jeff the producer should be ashamed to support this type of programming. The only real reason that viewers would watch Dance Moms was to root for Chole. Because Chole represents talent but also as important she represent respect in the face of adversity which she faced in every episode. Chole is a role model and inspiration to people in general and that is what Lifetime should be supporting and not the awful antics for Abby and Jill and Melissa which are so star hungry that they would lie, cheat, steal and back-stab anyone in order for her daughters to get 5 minutes of fame.

  4. I just watched parodies of Sia’s “Big Girls Cry” and “Elastic Heart” videos on YouTube. Hehehe… The Melissa parts were particularly funny.

      • Thanks, Michelle, for posting the Elastic Heart parody video right here! I don’t have anywhere near the computer skills required to do the same thing with the Big Girls Cry parody, but anyone who wants to watch it, just go to YouTube and search for Sia- “Big Girls Cry” Parody by Bart Baker. Or enter https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hC4d0MTuEKc (fair warning- there are a couple F-bombs at the end of the parody)

        • No problem LOL, all I did was copy and paste it, I’m definitely not an expert but thanks! I haven’t had a chance to watch the other videos on Bart’s channel, but I’ll definitely check this one out.

  5. Reunion show was rather boring. I do hate Holly is the Mom with the target on her back this year. Also Jill has turned into as big a liar and kiss-up as Melissa. I find I am liking Jess more and more she stays pretty calm and true to herself. How any of them can have respect for Abby is
    totally shocking to me. I would pick Cathy over Abby any day of the week,
    sure hope the show picks up some this season and becomes more interesting.

    • I hope we see more of the girls dancing. That was always secondary to the moms’ battles but in the last two seasons, dancing has become an afterthought. And there is no way on earth any of us would spend time with this version of any of these women (OK, maybe you, Jess) in real life, so expecting us to slog through more of their hysterics — even on the chance that we are just limping to the series end — is so not cool.

  6. HATED IT!!!!! What a mess the producer made out of this show. Way toooo many cuts that cut off the conversation. It was like the volume of voice of the person talking was the determining factor into when to make a cut. This was just a bunch of hollering over the same OLD stuff. Nothing new! And for your DM fans, have Holly and Christi become interchangeable? Some line of bull from Abby in response to challenges to her teaching style.

    Lets’ talk Abby. Option 1, embrace the fruit of your hard work in building the individual and team entertainment skills of all your dancers. Be proud of their work away from Dance Moms as an example that you have prepared them to be “professional” dancers. I have heard that the chorographers working with each dancer on their project are amazed at how prepared they are, how quickly they pick up on chirography, and hard they work to get the job done. That speaks to Abby’s work to transfer the dancers into the entertainment business.
    Option 2, be the center of the universe. No matter what the dancers do, unless Abby is involved it is not good enough. This leads to co-dependency, its work for Abby or no work at all. This just leads to fights amount the moms as to which dancer gets attention and which dancer is on the shelf. There is a name for a mental illness where a person takes the facts and re-arranges them so that it fits the outcome and appears that they had a plan all along. Putting Nia and Jojo on stage when there was no other dancers available since Abby created the problem but not include Nia/Jojo in the Jump training sessions.
    I was hoping for Option 1 but seem we still have Option 2. Sad, sad day.

    Jill has lost her mind!!!! Sorry but my judging scale for dancers would have Maddie, Kalani a close second, Jojo/MackZ as great entertainers, with Nia/Kendall in the running for fifth place. Brynn would be right there with Kalani so make that sixth place for Kendall. So why is Jill fighting (with very poor logic) with Holly and saying the Kalani needs the ALDC dancers. Jill, Jill you have lost your way.

    I love that each of the ALDC girls have their own personality and skill set as entertainers. When I think of Maddie, I think of a lump of clay that can be reshaped any way the story/chirographer wants. She is so committed to ever move and not afraid to fail. MackZ continues to grow and may become the entertainer with the widest range of opportunities. I love Kalani and Jojo natural love of life. Their performance in the MattyB video is just the tip of the iceberg for entertainer who drawls your eyes. Nia has found her niche in the sultry, bluesy, frieze dance style. As she matures she will grow as an entertainer. Kendall has become a much better technical dancer over her seasons on the show. She fills the “girl next store” role. Beautify to watch, elegant in her dance, combined with a wholesome image. The two videos have about the same number of views on YouTube demonstrating that they are not competing and that each girl’s success has no impact on the other girls’ video. Abby (and Jill) let it go.

  7. Great recap. I missed it as I was enjoying my son’s spring concert at school. I often wonder if Christi and Kelly get together and play drinking games watching Dance Mom’s. I’m glad Holly stands up for herself and for Nia. Nia has found her voice too and isn’t afraid to let Abby know it. Looking forward to more great recaps from you Lori!

  8. This is the most staged and over “produced” show ever. There are some truths to everything but it’s all SOOOOO blown out of proportion for television purposes that it’s ridiculous. This is what is wrong with the world….the focus is so out of whack. I originally watched this show with my daughter on and off for a couple years and feel there was so much less over the top drama. Now I feel it’s just about the drama and it’s no good for my daughter to see all the unnecessary behavior. I hope these girls know alot of the bad behavior from the mothers isn’t real…..

  9. After Holly is hauled over the coals, how come Melissa gets a free ride? She got several minutes to spout about how great she and her kids were, then, boom, right into a dance number with no opportunity for the other moms to call her on her bs. Collins thinks he has backed the right horse and is riding Maddie’s popularity just as far as it can take him.

  10. Why would Holly laugh at the things Cathy said about Abby?? Cathy was awful to all of the mothers, including Holly on different episodes. Holly is all about Holly!! I agree when she was told if you don’t like it leave. Why doesn’t she or why doesn’t Abby just not let Nia be a member of her studio. It is her studio. & how much of this is really true????

  11. Every time they showed the people in the audience, I found myself wondering if the guy wearing a blue sweater and vivid green pants was related to Orange Pants Guy. That’s how exciting this reunion show was. Also, I don’t think Kira got the memo about dressing in a subdued manner.

  12. I only got to after Abby yelled in Melissa’s ear twice. Disclaimer: most of these comments are sarcastic
    I love how Abby knows everything about kids and parenting from being a dance teacher. She not only knows how to raise children, but she knows hos to treat them(medically) as well. I mean, is there nothing this woman isn’t good at?!
    Jill knows she was lying about Holly telling Nia whatever it was she said Holly told Nia about them. She hadn’t planned on Melissa bringing it up or speaking for that matter.
    Reunion shows are pointless to me. No one ever owns up to their actions or their statements, they’ve had time to try and excuse their bull and it just makes them angry all over again.
    I don’t really like Holly(S5E1), but she read those idiots like instructions to assemble an entertainment system. She told no lies and held back nothing.
    Glad that Jill-ousy and MeLIESsa owned up to being cowards who were more concerned about repercussions than justice and equal rights for all involved. So what your child might take heat for you speaking up, but at least your child is learning to do the right thing and stand for their fellow man. With everything going on in the world today, that’s one of the biggest, bestest and most important things you can teach your child.

  13. OH and they did do a Maddie solo where she ended up tortured heap of emotions on the floor…your fav, if I remember our convo correctly Ms.Lori! Wouldn’t be a real reunion show unless Maddie did the MOST dances on it!

  14. Hmm…well. Everyone looked nice, not as much as a contest as it has been in the past, which is a shame cuz that’s one of the best parts but I thought all the moms looked great, especially Holly (she looks great in blue but last years yellow was STUNNING) and Jill (the white pants suit was hot, much better than the dress last year) and it showed she wanted to be different. Kinda the same as it has been through the season, Abby loves Mellissa and Jill, kinda hates Holly, tolerates Kira and is on the fence about Jess. The dances were great though, the lens wasn’t so solely focused on Maddie like in previous reunions but the stage seemed smaller, like they couldn’t fully perform but they still did great. I loved Jojo’s prom queen solo more since I saw the full thing, and I’m impressed, she does crazy very well.
    Overall it was ok…nothing exciting. the dances weren’t even properly segued into, but I’m more excited for the Australian episodes and how they’re gonna explain that on the show.

    Oh and Abby is never gonna forgive Holly and Nia for doing a video with someone else…Ever….Ever.

    • The whole thing just felt phoned in to me. Remember when we got in each other’s faces and stormed off the set and nearly came to blows and HAD to take dance breaks just to cool ourselves off? Now that happens every freakin’ episode, so this thing feels totally anti-climactic. I just kept rewinding to the Stomp the Yard dance.

  15. Best *Dance Moms* editing ever: the “boing boing” sound effect for the kangaroos.

    “I don’t even like dancing. I’m just here because my mom said she would buy me tacos” ~ Vivi-Anne

    • Now I know for sure that this sucker was a dud. John wasn’t even inspired to commit a song.

      • Boing boing, you bounced around
        Boing boing, hopped on the ground
        Boing boing, that bouncy sound
        Boing boing, my Joey hops around

          • You’re welcome Lori. This should make you feel better too:

            I almost feel sorry for Collins. With his reality star becoming a household name, I was kinda expecting the *Dance Moms* ratings to make a rebound – the rebound didn’t happen. This episode got 0.4 rating with 1.2 million viewers. The previous episode also got a 0.4 rating.

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About Lori Acken 1195 Articles
Lori just hasn't been the same since "thirtysomething" and "Northern Exposure" went off the air.