It’s the Season 4 Midseason finale, Dance Moms Nation and that means it’s time for the much-discussed new team. And the new mothers. Well, sort of new. One gave us a special little taste of her tact and refinement — and brought out the best in Melissa — last week. Another we met a month or so ago in Michigan. And another isn’t new to Kira at all. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
We start out on a somber note, because the show has finally caught up to Maryen Lorrain’s Feb. 8 death. As each Pitt Crew mother-daughter pair enters the studio, they offer Abby their condolences, which still leaves her visibly uncomfortable. When Abby says the show must go on, Abby means it, people. No time for mush.
In the studio, the girls are decked out in all new ALDC attire and Abby says they look like a whole new team. Not THE new team, mind you. But some kind of new team, anyway. Then she says that maybe competing last week wasn’t the best idea, but what the girls should take away from it is that they did a beautiful performance for Maryen Lorrain and that’s what counts. The winning streak was good while it lasted, but only ever being a winner doesn’t make you get any better.
Very wise, Abby. Now let’s punish people for how they performed last week. It’s pyramid time.
Bottom of the bottom is Chloe. Her solo got fifth, but from what Abby was hearing, she should have been second or third. So there’s that.
Next is Nia. She still has a long way to go. Like out the door and onto a studio that will do right by her, maybe?
Rounding out Row 3 is Kalani. Beautiful in the group, but she’s kinda just … there. Kinda beautifully there.
Row 2 starts with Kendall. She held her own in the group, but the solo is what we have trouble with. Wait, what solo? Did Kendall do a solo last week? Or is this another old sin, newly punished?
Rounding out Row 2 is Maddie. She went out there and did her solo like a rock star, but …
… baby sister Kenzie did it all this week. A solo we didn’t see. The group dance. And her (home) video’s director said the kid is going to be a star. Abby says the director is Andrew Logan, but if it’s this Andrew Logan, he’s not copping to it on his website.
Also, this is the face we’re supposed to believe that the star’s mother made at this news.
This is the face the star made, anyway.
Time to discuss the new team for the bazillionth time. Abby knows that the Pitt Crew has invested thousands of hours and dollars in her studio, but tough noogies, because times are a changin’. And now the ingrates have seen what people would do to be in their ungrateful shoes, so now it’s time to meet the folks who did the most.
Then Abby blows my mind and says the new team is just like the old team. There will just be one new team member to go up against each of the old team members, for the purpose of challenging them. Doesn’t have to be a negative thing unless they make it a negative thing.
Someone is making it a negative thing right out of the gate.
Abby’s final, pre-new-team words of wisdom are this: The girls have to understand there is always someone else. Then we are all called upon to take a deep breath because our very lives are about to change. Er, by these folks.
They don’t look too life-altering.
And like I said, they’re not entirely unfamiliar. Dance Mom Mama June Christy With a Y is there on the left, with her nervous little Sarah. Ava Cota is here with her mom Jeanette from back in episode 10, second from the right. And third from the right is Kira’s “trash from Arizona,” who is actually an understandably nervous-looking woman named Tracey Reasons.
Tracey is apparently from Kira and Kalani’s Arizona studio — anybody notice that Kira still calls it their studio, even though the move to Pittsburgh is supposed to be permanent? — and Kira says that’s because she wishes Kalani was her child. Er, what? And yes, I am just going to resign myself to the idea that every other moment in this episode is going to be an “Er, what?” moment.
Tracey’s kid is also named Sarah and looks like a pageant girl, minus the overblown emotions. Or, say, any. And how many titles has she won? None. None. None. Just ask Kira Kira Kira, who is making that known in her outside voice.
Abby wanted a whole team of Maddies, not Kalanis, chimes in another mother who is momentarily nameless, but is actually Loree Cloud, owner/director of New England Dance & Gymnastic Centers. Also, I am changing the spelling of my official Dance Moms name to Lorii, effective immediately. That double-vowel thing just looks so snappee.
Abby calls Sarah to step forward, then says she knows Kira thinks she dragged her and her mom all the way here from the AZ to challenge Kalani. She did not. She dragged her all the way from the AZ to challenge Nia. Sarah has yet to make one expression other than numb.
In an aside, Nia says she can do jazz, musical theater and ballet, while Sarah can only do acro. Ah. Acro. Abby actually imported a new Brooke or Paige, then?
Ava will be Kendall’s other-team competition. Jeanette is a studio owner, too — Broadway Dreams Dance Academy in Fenton, MI. What’s with all these studio-owner moms wanting their kids to dance for another studio? Can someone explain me this phenomenon? I mean, other than “TV show”? Is there an explanation other than TV show?
Anyway, Jill says Kendall and Ava are very different dancers — Kendall is the better performer and looks better on stage. So there.
Smiling Jade Cloud — who lives, sleeps, eats and breathes dance — is the daughter of Loree, the lady who just piped up about a team full of Maddies a couple seconds ago. Abby says Jade is a competition kid, so nothing is going to rattle her nerves. Including competing against Kalani, who doesn’t look rattled either.
Mack and Melissa’s competition shall be Tami and Tea’ Adamson. If what’s on the screen is to believed, that’s not a typo. Apparently there is an apostrophe in Tea’’s name. Which makes possessives a dandy challenge. Tea’ is also 9. Melissa looks at the little redhead and quips that she should have put pigtails in Mackenzie’s hair. “Shoulda done a lot of things,” Abby snarks. Melissa looks like she would like to barf about the whole situation.
Not our Mack. When Abby asks Tea’ if she thinks she’s better than Big Mack, Mack gives her one’a these.
“Um,” squeaks a helium-voiced Tea (I’m over the apostrophe), because we’re waiting for an answer. “Yes?”
Melissa is rejuvenated by the girl’s obvious discomfort and informs us that Tea will be a fine little playmate, maybe, but no competition for Mack.
Speaking of discomfort, this poor, terrorized little bugger —who is Christy With A Y’s daughter and whose weight is doubled by her false eyelashes — is charged with filling the 8-and-under slot that Mack vacated by turning 9.
But sometimes, it’s 9 and under, so Mack might have two direct competitors. Melissa goes back to looking unhinged.
Christy With A Y — let’s just call her CWAY from now on — says the fact that her Sarah — let’s just call her Sarah H from now on — is the only native ALDC’er to be chosen for the new team drives Melissa crazy. Melissa makes a crazy face to support that fact.
“You can pour water allllll over the stage and she can jeté through it and beat your kid again,” CWAY CWAY hollers. Not sure what that is about, but Melissa says that CWAY is just a big ball of negativity and Abby isn’t going to deal with it for long.
Next up is Kamryn, who — despite CWAY CWAY’s claim — Abby says has been in class at the ALDC and has been a joy to work with. Kamryn’s mom is Jodi, who has a lot of bangs. Her competition is Chloe, who graciously smiles at Kamryn and welcomes her. Chloe!
Then Abby has Kamryn recite all of her victories — 7-time national champion, 5-time Star Power National Champion and way too many regional and overall titles to name. Reading our minds while the kid recites her litany o’ victories, Christi says of course Abby isn’t going to put that kid up against Maddie. Chloe is always the sacrificial lamb.
Abby brings Maddie out into the space between each team, has her take a good long look at both, then tells her to turn to the Pitt Crew and say goodbye. Maddie’s stunned expression completely breaks my heart.
I know some of you will say it’s because she is used to her queen-bee status with the Pitt Crew, so the look is just one of fear at having new competition. I don’t think so. Maddie looks utterly confounded in a “little kid who finds out all her friends got one teacher and she got another” way. I’ve seen that face on my own kids and it killed me then, too.
Abby calls her to her side and tells her she is too good to compete against anyone else, so she’s going to the new team to show them how it’s done.
“Why?” stage whispers Jill. No one but Abby looks happy.
In an aside, Maddie says flat-out that she doesn’t want to compete against her best friends. She goes and stands mom-less in front of the row of newbies.
This week we will be going just up the road to Youngstown, Ohio for an Energy Dance invitational.
The Pitt Crew — which is now the Junior Elite Competition Team (and maybe always was, but it didn’t really matter until now) — will be doing a group dance about royals in tribute to Prince William and Duchess Kate … whoops, nope … in tribute to the Grammy-winning artist Lorde who sings the song called Royals. The girls hop up and down and holler with happiness. Maddie watches them wistfully.
The new team — which shall be called the Select Ensemble — will be doing a contemporary routine called “The Good Life,” because they’re at the Abby Lee Dance Company now and life is good. The mothers smile hopefully.
Kalani and Kendall will do a duet called “Rule the World,” in tribute to Beyoncé. More hopping and clapping. Sarah R and Ava will also be doing a duet. Realizing some sort of delirious reaction is apparently called for, they opt for a hug.
Chloe will be doing a lyrical solo entitled “Lucky Star.” What? No message dance? Not “My @$$ Is About to Be Whooped By Kamryn”? Or “Sacrificial Lamb”? Or “Always Second to Somebody?” Abby’s losing her edge.
Kamryn will be doing a contemporary solo entitled “Fate.”
Abby says this is Chloe’s last chance to prove she’s the best Chloe she can be. Then she turns to the new moms and tells them they have no idea what it is like to compete every weekend, and the expectations they will be facing because of that. You know, ladies — the good life.
Up in the Mom Loft, the Pitt Crew discusses the insult and injury that is the new team plus the pilfering of Maddie. Christi says they’re merely the leftovers now. Privately, Melissa finds it ironic that the moms complain endlessly about Maddie and then when she’s gone, they want her back. Aloud, she says this situation is not what she signed up for. Then she changes the subject to Tracey — what is her deal anyway?
Her deal is that she lies about everything, just ask Kira. Plus, she only enters her kid in competitions where there is no talent, and even then, Sarah’s never in the top ten anyway. Then they play choosies about which new mom is the most annoying. While we’re busy declaring CWAY CWAY the winner and deciding that, also, Jeanette has a stick up her ass, CWAY appears with the other mothers — we’ll call them EnsembleMoms — to lay claim to the Mom Loft turf.
How do you feel about that Melissa?
Also, way to crib Holly’s outfit, CWAY.
Also, don’t be scared, you poor, scared-looking Jodi. OK, be a little scared. You’re clearly a very nice person. That will get you nowhere here.
Even though they’re sort of bumbling about, Abby stares beatifically at her new dancers and hollers encouragement. In the Mom Loft, Melissa tries to explain the Pitt Crew’s feelings to the EnsembleMoms. Meh. Time for new faces, says CWAY.
It’s Jeanette’s job to ask Tracey for her side of the Kira story. Tracey says their kids are good friends, but they’ve had to leave a studio because of Kira’s deep-seated hatred.
Downstairs, Abby tells the new squad that they are the Chosen Ones. Chosen from all the kids who auditioned. Chosen to dance with Maddie. Chosen to go hit the showers while she talks to moms, new and old, because it’s good for them to hear what the other team’s girls need to work on. Melissa immediately defects to stand with the Pitt Crew.
“Your daughter?” Abby says to Tracey. “Surprisingly doing OK.” Er, what? She’s a Chosen One. Chosen from all the other dancers. Chosen to dance with Maddie. It should not be surprising that she is doing OK. It should be bad that she is just doing OK. I mean, shouldn’t it?
Then Abby says Tea and Sarah are young and have a lot of flaws. Be more specific, CWAY demands. Abby indulges the request. Your kid has horrible posture, she points out. Hmmm. Wonder where she got it?
Abby thinks Sarah’s posture is so bad that it requires a back brace that holds her chin in the air like someone in the front row of a movie theater. Yessir. Chosen kid. Kid who has been dancing at ALDC for a year. And we’re just pointing that out now.
CWAY pushes back, but Abby says she can take her advice or be a very sorry mom. I’m not sure CWAY has ever been sorry for anything in her life, so this is a pretty even matchup.
Then Tea’s smiley mom Tami is informed that her kid is from outer space, but we don’t get to find out what planet, because CWAY would like to return the discussion to Sarah and the potshot about her posture. Tami would prefer it remain on Tea. No, says CWAY. No.
Abby tells us that all CWAY’s mouthing off is doing is holding Sarah back. CWAY says that all Sarah dreams of is Abby’s time. Abby says CWAY is taking up her time right now, and all the other EnsembleMoms jump on the Hush It! bandwagon. Yelling. Yelling.
Isn’t this fun, Christi?
One of us thinks this is fun.
Take the last expression, Holly.
After Holly notes that if this was supposed to be a team of perfect dancers with perfect moms, it’s not shaping up so well, the Pitt Crew moms sashay out, waving and wishing Abby good luck with this fresh hell she’s created for herself.
Time to run Kamryn’s solo. Abby beams and says she is an Abby dancer through and through, and that her solo is called Fate because maybe fate put her at the Orlando audition and brought them together.
Up in the Mom Loft, a nervous Jodi (who really needs to trim an inch off those bangs) asks Melissa to be her Abby Face interpreter. Melissa looks deep into Abby’s countenance.
“Abby really likes your daughter,” she concludes.
Sarah and Ava will be doing a contemporary acro routine called “Birds of a Feather Flock Together,” furthering augmenting my growing suspicion that this whole new-team crap is really Abby’s way of trying to replace Paige and Brooke’s ability to compete acro dances, without having to say outright that she’s doing so.
Everyone chortles amiably about how much the lanky blond girls look like sisters, until the reverie is broken with an approximately 400-million decibel, “ARMS UP OVER YOUR HEEEEEAD!!!! AVA, WAKE UUUUUP!!!”
Welcome to the ALDC, EnsmbleMoms. Enjoy your stay.
Down in the studio, Ava looks up at her mom, decidedly nonplussed, but Jeanette says that the way Abby teaches works and ignores the glance.
Then Melissa informs the newbies that they have no idea what everyone there has been through lately, what with Maryen’s death and all. When her mom died, she stayed home from work for at least three days. But Abby’s here. So everyone needs to be helpful and supportive and not fight and be nice. Unless they’re Abby.
CWAY CWAY does not agree with that assessment at all. Abby is offending her tender sensibilities and that calls for a rigorous defense. Tami lifts her chin defiantly and says Abby’s corrections for her daughter were spot-on. CWAY says everyone hates her, even though she’s trying to connect and get some empathy. And making really alarming pwwwwssshh noises that go with this face.
Oh, honey. Oh CWAY. If you think this is the place to come for empathy from anyone, you clearly have not been paying the least bit of attention. But thank you for singlehandedly making this episode much more fun to blog.
CWAY declares everyone heartless. And also two-faced.
But they are wearing some bitchin’ variations on leggings, so they have that going for them.
Out in the parking lot, we have a meeting of the moms that quickly devolves into a Kira-Tracey throw-down. The new moms defend Tracey and the confab comes to an uncomfortable end.
Christi says the new moms have gotten awfully comfortable awfully fast. Then she, Jill and Holly take Melissa to task for being a lousy spy for how the other dancers are doing. Holly says that’s the best part of having Maddie on the other team — Melissa can infiltrate.
When it’s time for Kalani and Kendall to practice their duet, Abby tells them it’s a jazz routine so they should take their hair down, which inspires Jill to get her Willow Smith on and sing us a little Whip My Hair, which Christi really enjoys. Then Abby starts demonstrating the dance and everyone decides Jill should run down and take part. She does a Rachelle Rak, instead. Action shot!
Bite the apple, Jill. Bite the apple.
K&K’s duet is called Rule the World. Abby says Sarah R and Ava are tall and have gorgeous lines, while Kalani and Kendall are just plain gorgeous and good performers. The results should be all about the judges’ opinion.
Then she says it doesn’t matter who Chloe is up against — she needs to bring her A game or else. She also needs to be given an A-game dance and some A-game practice time, A-bby. Just saying.
Abby says even though this isn’t the easiest week of her life, what with planning two teams’ worth of dances and her mother’s funeral all at once, she’s still planning on a clean sweep of the competition.
Running the Select Ensemble’s group dance, Abby tells Sarah H (who has been mercifully relieved of her eyelashes, but still doesn’t look very happy) that she has no style. She’s 8. I had no style when I was 8 either. I didn’t even know what style was. Forty years later, I still don’t, but that’s another story for another day.
Jeanette says she thinks CWAY has a such a big chip on her shoulder because she thinks Sarah should have been a part of the original team. Jodi tries to knock said chip off by saying they need to be a team the way their daughters are being a team.
Sort of, argues the CWAY. Jodi tells her to knock it off. CWAY tells her and the other EnsembleMoms to wake up. Abby’s not going to keep two girls of every age, like the Lady Noah of Dance or something. Oh yes she would, argues Melissa. CWAY retorts that Melissa is just a game-player who messes with people’s lives. Melissa tells her to get real, then gets up and leaves. Tracey hollers that she doesn’t blame her. CWAY asks God to bless Melissa in a way that suggests damnation would be a fine alternative.
Behind this door also sits Melissa and Maddie, glumly discussing how this new team really isn’t Maddie’s team and Maddie knows it. Maddie wants to know if these new moms are even more drama than the other moms, and Melissa fibs a little and says no. There’s really only one troublemaker, but Maddie doesn’t need to concern herself. Just be a kid. A kid knows whose mouth she keeps hearing.
Back in the studio, Abby runs Kamryn’s solo, then taps away on her phone while Chloe runs hers. Christi says she thinks Kamryn and Jodi think they’re shoo-ins for the win. But the silver lining is that both Christi and Chloe love Chloe’s choreography and music, and the way Chloe at long last, gets to dance with passion and emotion.
Melissa fails again at spy-teching the solos, but she does reveal that the EnsembleMoms are going to celebrate tonight and she turned down their invite to join them. Jill says they don’t necessarily have to crash the party, per se, but they could, you know, just show up and have a drink of their own. Since we all just happen to be dressed for doing out and all. Everyone is game for the plan.
But first the children must dance. Holly says a good lyrical dance will beat a jazz funk dance every single time, not to mention that the girls are used to doing pretty, floaty group dances, not funky dances in combat boots, so the Pitt Crew is being set up to fail. She could’ve predicted Maddie was going to the other team, just by virtue of that.
Since she’s such a neophyte with the judges, Abby says who knows where they will turn their favor — lyrical or funk. It just better not be a team from another studio. But now she is simply too tired to work with the Elites any further, even though she spent an entire day with the Ensemble. Even Melissa, who is theoretically in a win-win situation here, calls it, and I quote, bullsh*t. Holly says she already feels defeated, and they’re still in Pittsburgh.
CHEERS! And another one, because one particular mom is missing! Someone is not a joiner.
Why does this booth look like it’s in the restroom of whatever swanky Pittsburgh hotel to which we’ve apparently gone to drink? Also, New Momsie Drinkies was Tami’s idea. Tracey has to be honest — she is not missing the CWAY.
But here comes the original cray.
That is the weirdest bar I have ever seen in my entire life. And I have seen a lot of them. Backing up a little, it looks like the lobby of whatever hotel at which I am guessing all of the non-CWAY new moms are residing, since we all pretty much know they aren’t around for good.
Tami wants to know why Melissa could come out with this group of moms but not the new group of moms. Well, they just happened to be out to dinner across the street, so you know.
Loree says she should sit in the middle of both groups. Melissa ain’t havin’ it. These Moms is her moms. Her moms ain’t you moms. No matter who wins. Or who drops f-bombs. From the redwood forest to the Gulf Stream waters … oh … uh …
This team was made for you and me!
No matter what sort of pissing match we have going on here, Jeanette says she looks forward to cheering on all of the kids. Because we’re all competing for the same studio, Loree chimes in. Oh, my special, naïve ladies! Loree asks Melissa if she agrees. Melissa most certainly does not.
“Our Abby Lee jackets our kids earned, and I can’t believe you guys got them as soon as you walked in the door,” says Melissa.
Loree still tries reasoning. Abby brought in their kids to light a fire under the Pitt Crew’s kids. Don’t need it, say Kira and Melissa. Tracey, who has trouble finding the right words — or, say, any — stammers that she’d hoped to be a little more welcomed here, which opens the floodgates for all kinds of Kira smack and wrath. Tracey gets up to leave, shaming Kira for picking on a little girl. Kira decides to pick on a big girl instead, reducing Tracey to tears.
At what price your 15-minutes of fame, Tracey?
And we’re off to Youngstown, where Maddie still walks in with her old teammates, who are all wearing matching hats to set them apart from the interlopers. Abby tells the kid to get over where she belongs. And this is where we find out that this new team is hardly permanent. Abby tells them that if they screw up, it’s back to wherever it is they came from via their Atlanta, New York and Orlando audition sites.
Are we starting over then, or what? Because God forbid we leave the original team alone.
Then Abby asks Kira if she told her pal from Arizona that if she needs anything, Kira would be happy to help. Kira says Tracey can drown in hell. I think you mean burn, Kira. It’s hot down there. We’d have evaporation issues with water.
In the hallway on the way to the stage, Abby tells both teams that off the stage they are friends. On the stage, they are opponents. In the auditorium, the EnsembleMoms are relegated to the row behind the Pitt Crew.
Birds of a Feather goes first.
There is much more good than bad, but this is not a Pitt Crew caliber dance by any stretch, if you ask me. Or maybe I’m just not used to seeing these kids dance. Jeanette says she was watching Abby the whole time and thought she enjoyed it. And she did that interpreting all by herself without Melissa’s help.
Kendall and Kalani go next.
Oy. This one is just so-so for me, too, and kind of feels like they were set up to lose. But Kira says it’s no contest. Abby says it’s going to be a tight competition.
And looky who’s here! I mean besides the gesticulating crewmember in the skull-and-crossbones t-shirt.
Cathy said she had no clue the ALDC was going to be there, and she herself is only there because her one girl who is the title winner is here to pass out trophies, so she tagged along. No one is competing. But since she’s here, what IS the dealio with the two teams?
Abby explains it like this: “Get out.”
When hiding behind her purse doesn’t work — and scores her an insult, to boot — she raises the decibel level a notch or 50 until the EnsembleMoms — who are being kept in another room — have to come see what the ruckus is about.
Cathy complimenting her dress instantly disarms Tami. CWAY wants to know if she has any water on her. Match made in heaven, right there, says Jill.
Abby has had enough. There is only place Cathy belongs and their get-ready room ain’t it.
Kamryn and Chloe emerge in their costumes. Both are very pretty. Chloe runs her solo by herself while Abby runs Kamryn’s and helps her with her makeup.
Yikes. No wonder Abby didn’t want Maddie and Kamryn on opposing teams. The kid is Maddie all over again. The solo is lovely, and complicated and she performs it beautifully.
I’m a little scared for my girl. So is Christi.
Oh! Yay! Goosebumps. Finally a dance and a costume and music that is worthy of Chloe’s talent.
Even Abby says she did an amazing job. Danced like a professional. And always would, Abby, if you’d put your feelings toward her mother aside and gave her worthy tools to succeed.
Then it’s time for the group dances to get dressed. The Royals are actually the royal’s maids, while the Ensemble are dressed in Abby’s signature frocks and bows. Holly says the underlying message is nothing short of insulting.
CWAY comes over to report that the EnsembleMoms want to pray over their dance. Doesn’t Melissa want to, too? No she does not. Sure? Sure. Okaaaaay. But they’re going to pray over it anyway, even though Melissa clearly wants Jesus to curse it.
Abby chimes in and says Melissa is officially not allowed in the EnsembleMothers’ room, no matter what Jesus or CWAY CWAY would do, because CWAY has been on Abby’s last nerve all week long. And that last nerve is about to take another beating. CWAY wants to know why Abby is protecting Melissa. Abby says she’s not. CWAY calls Abby a liar.
Now would be a good time to run, CWAY. Or, you know, add that if the shoe fits. That’s a swell idea, too.
Both of Abby’s shoes, and the rest of her, get up and head into the Ensemble room. Abby informs Sarah H that her mother is removing her from the team.
Nice job, ladies. Nice one.
While Abby reblocks the dance — anybody else suspect she didn’t really want poor little Sarah in there in the first place? — Christy informs us that her kid isn’t going anywhere. She’ll fight for her place on the team. It’s not her that’s the problem, dear. And there needs to be less fighting, not more.
Loree can’t believe Abby is revamping the dance now. Tracey just needs to throw up. In the trashcan. Good thing Cathy stopped by early. Gina, the competition lady who looks weirdly like former Candy Apple Mari’s mom Gina (because, I guess, it is — thanks Wrath!), needs the girls on stage right this minute, whether Tracey’s hurling in the garbage or otherwise.
Backstage, a wired little Tea gives a breathless “we can do it!” speech. Abby says they have Maddie, so they’re fine. Because judges love them some Maddie. And indeed, from a distance, this could be just another lovely Pitt Crew dance with Maddie at the forefront.
Abby looks tickled.
Kalani takes pep talk duties for the original team. Holly says she only has a little shred of hope they can pull off a win. I try hard to pay attention to the dance, but I’m so amused by the audacity of the “Royals” knock-off of a song that I can’t even concentrate.
Maddie cheers from the sidelines. Holly says they couldn’t have done better.
Come awards time, we all do a little Gangnam Style and Mack does a very impressive Worm. Careful there, little pop star. Don’t break Abby’s golden ticket to music-management stardom.
In the duet category, Rule the World gets third place. Birds of a Feather gets second.
Tracey — whom I truly hope brought a toothbrush and some Colgate along in her purse — says that that makes everything she went through this week worth it.
Royals gets second. The Good Life gets first. Abby says this makes it very obvious that she knows what she id doing. Yes. Giving one group a better dance than the other group.
In the solo division, Kamryn’s Fate gets third. Jodi says her girl has never placed so low. I’m pretty surprised, too.
But the lovely Chloebird gets first, and even Abby does an overhead clap and says that’s where she belongs. She is so, so proud of her. And so, so sorry you wasted her for so much of the season? That, too, Abby?
Heading back to the get-ready with the EnsembleMoms at their heels, Melissa calls them shadows … durn near like Cathy. Before things can really erupt, Abby appears. She lines everybody up and says they all well. But now she must jet off to Maryen’s funeral in Miami. She will be in touch. No one kill anyone on the ride home. I added that last part by myself.
In a final aside, Abby says this is the legacy Maryen left her. Is she doing right by the kids? Is she making them the best they can possibly be? Is she giving them the tools to go out into the world and make it on their own? Because that’s what her mom and dad did for her.
Then she gives us a final promise/warning: this is not the end of the teams. It’s just the beginning.
So what say you, Dance Moms nation? Was the arrival of the new team the earth shaker you were expecting? DId it rejuvenate your interest in the show? Is 90 minutes of CWAY CWAY too many minutes of CWAY CWAY? Was Kira just a leeeetle tough on Tracey? Are you touched by Melissa’s Pitt Crew loyalty? Is Abby’s seeming change of ‘tude enough to bring you back for the second half of the season or do you need time to think it over? Sound off in the comments section below.
Next week on the Dance Moms reunion special “Seeing Red,” the girls dance, Christi storms out and says she’s done and JC, Executive Producer Superstar, looks like this.
The Dance Moms Seeing Red Reunion Special premieres Tuesday, April 22 at 9/8CT.