Maybe (but probably not) you saw the new competition series Oh Sit! on The CW last night, an extreme version of musical chairs. Seriously. We’re not making this up. It was on TV and everything. There’s video evidence above. But here are five new reality TV schoolyard games we did make up:
Duck Duck Goose of Doom Experts in various disciplines of mixed martial arts sit in a circle, with the picker challenging the goose to chase him in a Ninja Warrior-style course, followed by a cage-fighting match.
Tube Top Tetherball Tetherball got a bounce in popularity from Napoleon Dynamite, but expect a bigger bounce when swimsuit models take on exotic dancers in this version that brings new meaning to “double touchie.”
Full-On Four Square An average guy takes on three retired pro athletes unwilling to give up the spotlight in a high-octane, adrenaline-fueled quest to achieve the rank of king.
Kick the Can of Love One bachelorette (usually a runner-up from a previous season) defends the can from 12 bachelors. The man who kicks the can gets to have a pretend engagement with the woman and an ugly, public breakup six months later.
Financial Freeze Tag Seven millionaires are released into a schoolyard, with the “it” one having all of his assets frozen until he can get 1 million votes via text message. The game ends when their moms call them home for dinner.