“How I Met Your Mother”: Old King Clancy Recap

By Mike Frey

Synopsis: Things have been rough for Ted at work, as he develops a design for the new Goliath National Bank headquarters. The guy in charge of the project, Bilson, doesn’t like any of Ted’s ideas and it makes for a hostile work environment. Everything changes, though, when Bilson is taken off the project and replaced with a task force who loves all of Ted’s ideas. They should, since the force is made up of a Ray the janitor; Louisa the lunch lady; 15th Street’s own one-man band, Crazy Artie, and his assistant, Reginald the squirrel; and some interns — all of whom have been paid 50 bucks to enthusiastically support Ted. It seems the project has been called off due to the poor economy, but Barney and Marshall would rather stage an elaborate hoax than to hurt Ted’s feelings and tell him the truth.

It all works out in the end, as Ted is reassigned to design the new employee transition room, or ETR, on the 20th floor — which is basically the room where people get fired. Despite Ted’s deviation from the original plan to simply re-create the ETR on the 18th floor, Bilson loves the design. He brings Ted into the old ETR to further discuss things and promptly fires him. Long story short: Ted hits Bilson with a chair and gets fired from his real job, but is happy because now he can open up his own firm.

Meanwhile, at McLaren’s, it is revealed that Robin once had an encounter with a Canadian celebrity who collected a mystery item and wanted to engage in a certain Canadian sex act with her. Lily wants to know the details — who, what, when and in what — and an impromptu game of dirty Clue breaks out.

• Was it Bryan Adams, collecting baseball cards, wanting to do a Greasy Kayak?

• Wayne Gretzky, vintage Hot Wheels, Squatting Eskimo?

• Kiefer Sutherland, souvenir shot glasses, Sticky Flapjack?

• Alex Trebek, Beanie Babies, Musty Goaltender?

• Anyone from the band Rush, superhero lunchboxes, Montreal Meat Pie?

• Rick Moranis, antique Judaica, Reverse Rick Moranis?

Turns out it was the Frozen Snowshoe (a Canadian wrestler), who collected Harvey’s trays (see below) and wanted to do an Old King Clancy — which is the same as a Sacramento turtleneck, except with maple syrup. Or at least that’s how Robin tells the story. After the final commercial break, we learn it was actually Robin who was the royal pervert and the Frozen Snowshoe who wasn’t aboot to the dirty things she had in mind.

What We Liked:


There, you can learn all about the Old King Clancy, Reverse Rick Moranis, Montreal Meatpie, Saskatoon Totem Pole, Musty Goaltender, Sticky Flapjack, Squatting Eskimo, Five-Legged Caribou, Newfoundland Lobster Trap, Manitoba Milk Bag, Two-Handed Zamboni, Sneaky Snowplow, Full Mountie, Sloppy Dog Sled, Halifax Fudge Badger, Two Girls, One Stanley Cup, Brown Icicle, Frosty Mitten Job, Montreal Petting Zoo, Wet Ski Mask, Edmonton Soiler, Salty Prime Minister, One-Tusked Walrus and Northwest Passage.

• “Your hair and teeth look fantastic today. You’re shining like a diamond.” Everyone should get to hear compliments like those every day

• Marshall’s comedy routine at open mic night. Trout, sturgeon, salmon, bass, halibut — that’s funny stuff.

• You’re road tripping down the Trans-Canada Highway, you get a hunger on between Milverton and Wawa — where are going to strap on a feedbag? Harvey’s. Over 12,000 served.” We’ve so been there, Robin.

• The idea that Robin carries maple syrup around in her purse.

What We Didn’t Like:

• Canada. Why do we let you be a country?

• The thought of Ted introducing some wood into Bilson’s dark atrium

• The fact that Ted’s game-winning walk was a lie

• “How naked do I have to get?” — Ray the janitor’s response when Marshall asks him if he’d like to make a little extra cash

Best Barneyism: “A space where a supervisor and an employee engage in a knowledge transfer about an impending vocational paradigm shift.” — Barney’s explanation of an employee transfer room