Out Of The Crate And Irate: A "Family Guy" Recap

Posted by Sarah

At the Drunken Clam, Peter and the gang are watching G.I. Jose: A Real Mexican Hero, and after the little educational bit at the end is a news report about Barry Manilow coming to Quahog. Everyone takes a swipe at Manilow and his pathetic fans before admitting that they totally love him and own everything he’s ever recorded. Flash to the concert, where the four of them are weeping like the fangirls they are. Barry says he needs someone from the audience to sing to onstage, and after rejecting a Claire and a Harriet for incorrect numbers of syllables, he chooses Quagmire and serenades him with an altered version of “Mandy.”

The next day, Peter sees an ad for SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAY’s $12 Lasik surgery, but when he reaches for his wallet, it’s not there. His credit card bill shows that someone’s been charging thousands of dollars in his name. Brian figures out that the thief eats at the same restaurant every day, so they show up to confront him and it’s … James Woods! Escaped from the crate!

James Woods proceeds to take over Peter’s life, starting with the house. Since he has all the paperwork, Joe has no choice but to kick Peter out and go to the Clam with James Woods. When Peter tries to visit the house, Woods threatens him: “Either you leave, or I set up one of your random flashbacks.” What choice does Peter have but to go stay in a crappy hotel?

Meanwhile, Lois can’t stand having Woods around the house. Chris seems to like him, and Meg gets bulimia lessons from him.

Peter needs a plan, and Brian has one: Peter can steal James Woods’ identity and ruin his life. He gets a fake I.D. from Stewie and goes on Letterman as James Woods, which Dave has to believe because Peter’s got all the paperwork. “James Woods” is there to promote his new movie, September 11, 2000FUN, in which he plays a window washer who’s just finished washing the last window on the World Trade Center. He turns around, sees a plane (voiced by David Spade), and says, “Oh, come ON!”

The real James Woods, watching this with Lois and the fam at home, can’t take it and confronts Peter at the bar. Peter lures him into the alley and again traps him with the trail of candy and box. Peter’s reunited with his family, but where is James Woods?

Exactly where he ended up last time.

Let’s just say that this episode made me very happy that the writers strike is over. I give it 3 out of 10. Highlights include:

•The Hydrox Arena making an appearance

•Headline: “Man Kills Self After Watching Garden State

•The poop sack

•The return of Johnny! Pity he ended up in Hell, but it was great to see him again.

•James Woods’ pronunciation of “trespasser”

•Peter doing magic for the blind: “Is this your card?” “I don’t know.” “Was it a red card?” “I don’t know what red IS.”