I’m seriously ready for some drama tonight. We’ve been given a glimmer of hope that we find out what the drama is with Jack. We begin the episode with Jack discussing a sore that he thought was a zit, but by the way it’s growing, it’s definitely not a zit. Apparently he has had staph infections in the past, and he’s hoping that this is not one of them. I can’t blame him. It’s a nasty thing to have.
But first, it’s model selection time. There’s this really weird shadow behind the Project Runway logo. What appears is a group of rather ordinary-looking woman. Steven wonders if these are people’s relatives, but he realizes that he doesn’t know any of them.
Heidi ends the suspense. This week’s models are women who’ve all lost a significant amount of weight. They introduce themselves and say how much weight they’ve lost, which in some cases is staggering. The models are wearing their favorite outfits from their pre-weight loss life, so they are comically huge on these women now. The designers’ task is to create a new outfit from these old clothes.
Heidi randomly assigns women to the designers and Steven is freaking because his model/client is wearing a wedding dress. Lace, beads, polyester — the whole 9 yards. Literally. Steven finds it to be like death on a stick to have to use a wedding dress.
Back in the workroom, the designers see a sweet note from Chris pinned to a dress form. Sweet P is crying as Tim Gunn reads it. Now I’m just bummed Chris is gone. The designers have 30 minutes to meet with their clients & sketch before shopping at Mood. These outfits are supposed to be for everyday.
Christian’s client only wears black shirts & jeans. Only. No color. No pattern. Black and jeans and that’s it. So he’s a bit frustrated, but really, we’ve just given Christian carte blanche to sail through to the next competition. I know others could screw up a black shirt & jeans, but that would take some serious effort. Steven is sweating, and starting to panic right off the bat.
In the midst of this, Jack’s face is swelling up dangerously, and fast. When Tim comes around to check on the designers, Jack spoke with Tim off camera. When he came back in, Tim announced that Jack needed to leave the show & get treatment. What actually happened was a bit more complicated, but the good news is that Jack is fine now.
So, of course at this point we’re down a contestant. So, will there be an elimination this episode?
That question is still hanging out there, when we see Ricky trying on his model’s pants, since they’re about the same size, with gold strappy heels. Then Tim comes in to let the designers know that the models will be coming in for another fitting. Tim also has a surprise — it’s Chris!
Since Jack had to go, and apparently the show didn’t want to forgo an elimination tonight, they decided to bring Chris back for another shot. There’s cheering and crying and Tim tells Chris that he gets to work all night long to make up for the time he’s down. Oh, goody.
Chris wishes he had Steven’s wedding dress. Tim warns Chris to avoid the costume trap and to plan things out carefully to avoid making a bad decision at 3am. Tim goes on to tell Chris he can’t imagine how many bad decisions he’s made at 3am. This statement cracks everyone in the design room up. Personally, I don’t want to imagine any of Tim Gunn’s bad 3am decisions, but it’s moments like these that I love about Project Runway. It’s a collection of really talented people working hard and getting really, really punchy. Fun!
I’d like to mention the HD ad with the cookie who claimed that he looked so good he wanted to eat himself. Disturbing. Really disturbing. More disturbing than when Homer Simpson was a donut. You expect that out of Homer.
It’s the morning of the runway show & the designers come in to Chris passed out & sawing wood on the couch. He doesn’t even know if he was able to create anything the night before. Kevin realizes that he washed the measurements off his hand when he showered that morning. Whoops. Christian disses everyone else’s designs, since he’s all fierce and stuff. Ricky keeps crying and then at least two designers, Kevin and Victorya, get to helping Steven since he’s in major meltdown mode and they’re ready to go.
Commercial break: Does the girl from Atonement come from a cornfield and know someone named Malachi? I’m just wondering, ’cause she’s sure got the look.
Let’s start the show.
Heidi has gone all Charlie’s Angels for this runway show — bangs and dressed in something that could’ve been designed by Uli.
Coming down the runway are weird things, like Elisa’s big-bustle-butt tiered bit of weird and Steven’s glued black sack dress. Also coming down are pretty things, like Kevin’s bustier and Christian’s way easy black shirt and jeans.
It should be no surprise that the judges rip into both Steven and Elisa. Nina tells Steven he went from a wedding to a funeral. Chris isn’t spared either, as Michael Kors thinks that his model looked like she should have a cigarette and a beret since she looked like a Shirley MacLaine ’50s Parisian hooker.
Commercial break: We get the results of this week’s poll which asks which designer we would like to see again. Daniel V wins hands down. I’m wondering if Dan Savage was voting via speed dial.
The winner, and receiver of immunity for next week’s challenge, is Christian and all his fierceness. Chris is still in — yay! The bottom two, no surprise, are Steven and Elisa. It’s Steven who’s sent packing, and really, it couldn’t have gone any other way. His dress was just awful. Elisa’s wasn’t great, but she at least used the fabric she was given.
Next week looks like it could be the “let’s use some weird crap to make a dress” competition. Fun!
