Amazing Race: We’ve Really Burned Bridges, For Sure

We find our teams ready to leave the Pit Stop at Hotel De Ville in Ouagadougou. Azaria & Hendekea are the first to depart at 6:45am. The clue is to fly to Vilnius, Lithuania and drive their marked cars to St. Anne’s Church. Nathan & Jennifer are second to depart. Jennifer declares, “Our eyes are full of fire right now. We are going to use that ball of fire that’s inside of us to just rage through.”

Bex: I hope that really means “rage at each other.” I love it when these two get into it.

They are followed by Ronald & Christina and Nicolas & Donald. Grandpa Don thinks this is a good experience for him and his grandson to do together so they can share their adventures with the rest of their family. Nicholas says that Don “can’t remember where he put two hats in two days, let alone remember what we have done on the race.”

Bex: I know where you are coming from, Nicolas. Reminds me of one of my family members.

Next to depart are Kynt & Vyxsin and Shana & Jennifer. Jennifer is feeling very, very guilty about using the U-Turn on the last leg to oust Lorena & Jason.

Bex: Jennifer, I will no longer refer to you as a Bimbo. I am proud of you, girl. Shana, you still wear that label proudly.

Michelle: Good Blonde vs. Bad Blonde – who will win?!

TK & Rachel are the last team to leave at 7:59am.

Bex: We never got to hear how much money they are given on this leg.

Michelle: I’m glad they are finally headed to the airport; maybe there will be a little more excitement in Lithuania.

The teams arrive at the “Internet buffet” (thanks, Grandpa Don) and jockey for airline tickets from Ouagadougou to Vilnius. After some great lines from Ronald about needing to “expand beyond the fossilization of just these carriers” and Nicolas reminding the teams “It’s just a game” and how they are all really enemies, the teams all depart Ouagadougou for Paris at the same time.

Michelle: Nicolas & Don don’t get the flight they wanted but two teams behind them did. How did that happen? Nicolas does get a little pushy under stress and you’ve got to be nice to people helping you, especially if you don’t speak their language. I don’t think that agent messed with the flight, but she’s not going to go out of her way to help if the guy’s being a jerk.

While waiting at the airport, Shana & Jennifer begin the meltdown process. Shana tries to block a door so no one can see what seat selection they are getting on the plane and begins to royally tick everyone off, including her teammate. She and Jennifer bicker non-stop.

Bex: I bet some viewers were hoping for a catfight.

TK has words of wisdom about Shana & Jennifer and imparts them onto Nathan, “The teams that stress out and waste a bunch of energy are the ones that don’t make it to the end.”

Bex: Why do I have the feeling that Nathan will totally ignore this hippie’s advice?

Michelle: I hope TK is right – I don’t want Nathan & Jennifer or Shana to win the million dollars. (Sorry, other Jennifer!)

So all of the teams get to Paris without much more ado. Flying through Amsterdam and arriving in Vilnius at 1:25pm are Azaria & Hendekea, Nathan & Jennifer and Shana & Jennifer. Flying through Frankfurt and arriving in Vilnius at 1:35pm are Kynt & Vyxsin, TK & Rachel and Nicolas & Don. Flying through Prague and arriving in Vilnius at 2:10pm are Ronald & Christina. In other words, the teams are pretty bunched up again.

Arriving at the airport, the teams all scramble for their marked cars and try to find their way to St. Anne’s Church.

Michelle: The blonde team has gotten more sympathetic (thanks to Jennifer) but not any smarter; they are still looking for their marked car when the teams on the second flight are driving away.

Christina asks a taxi to drive them there as they follow. Ronald thinks this is the greatest idea since sliced bread. He must have never seen the Race before.

Some teams are working well together, while others are close to boiling point.

Nathan & Jennifer are talking what they must consider sweet-talk to each other, quoting Nathan, “I just can’t believe what kind of person you’ve turned into. It’s the ugliest thing I’ve every seen in my life” to which Jennifer coos back, “Same with you, Nate.”

Michelle: Oh Nathan and Jennifer, you guys are too cute together!

Shana & Jennifer get so flustered that Jennifer decides to back the car up right into the path of an oncoming bus.

Bex: I hope the camera operator had a change of shorts along.

Nicolas & Don are first to arrive at the next clue, which is a Roadblock. “Who’s a good listener?” The racer becomes a Lithuanian messenger. They must choose one of the women working outdoors, get a package and destination from her and take it on foot through the old quarter of the city. After delivering the package, they will receive a second package to be taken to one of 4 final destinations to receive the next clue.

The first destination for all of the teams was to find different students at the Vilnius University Courtyard. Now, this was a bit hard to document, so how about if we break it down like this. The teams arrived in the following order and it went like so:

Nicolas was 1st to the University, had to go to Sidabrynas Hair Salon and was the 7th to complete the task.

Kynt was 2nd to the University, had to go to Gabi Cafe and was the 1st to complete the task.

Hendekea was 3rd to the University, had to go to Sidabrynas Hair Salon and was the 5th to complete the task.

Ronald was 5th to the University, had to go to St. Germain Restaurant and was the 3rd to complete the task.

TK was 4th to the University, had to go to St. Germain Restaurant and was the 2nd to complete the task.

Jennifer (of Nathan & Jennifer) was 6th to the University, had to go to Gabi Cafe and was the 4th to complete the task.

Shana was 7th to the University, had to go to Shakespeare Hotel and was the 6th to complete the task.

Bex: Whew.

Michelle: That hair salon must not be very popular; plenty of locals knew where the other places were.

The next clue is for the teams to drive to the town of Rumšiškės and go to the Lietuvos Liaudies Buities Muziejus, an outdoor ethnographic museum, and follow the marked road to the Dzūkija village.

Once there, the teams receive their next clue… Gnomes, gnomes everywhere. Teams must find the Product Placement gnome among the hundreds there and bring it along with them to the Pit Stop. After finding their gnome, the teams are to continue along the marked patch to where their next clue awaits.

And it’s a Detour – Count Down or Step Up. In Count Down, the teams must count every picket around a farmhouse, excluding the pickets in the gates or the fence posts. In Step Up, the teams must stilt walk along a marked path. If they fall off the stilts, they must return to the beginning to start again.

Bex: No questions, Michelle. With my bad ankles, I would insist we do Count Down.

Michelle: Yeah, that stilt walking looks tricky. We’d be good at counting, if those damn fair-goes would stay out of our faces!

Kynt & Vyxsin and Azaria & Hendekea at first choose Step Up, but then wise up and do Count Down. TK & Rachel and Ronald & Christina are the only 2 teams that accomplish the stilts (Ronald’s hernia did not thank him for this). Then on to the next Pit Stop: Run to the Aukstaitija Windmill. These 4 teams are the first to arrive at the Pit Stop, with TK & Rachel winning the Product Placement gnome’s trip to Japan.

This is where our two happy-go-lucky teams really turn up the rage towards each other. Nathan & Jennifer chose Count Down. After getting their total wrong twice, screaming at the villagers, berating each other, including Nathan calling Jennifer the “B” word, they decide they should try Step Up. They really did not seem to have much of a problem with that and are the 5th to arrive at the Pit Stop.

Bex: I thought these two were athletes. Why didn’t they choose the stilts in the first place? The more I see of these two, the more I am convinced they deserve each other and will probably get married only to live long miserable lives together, scarring their children and annoying their neighbors. But damn, they are good TV!

Nicolas & Donald go right for Count Down. In a feat that was next to impossible, Nicolas accomplishes the following: he gets halfway through counting the pickets before he realizes that he has included some of the fence posts and gates in his count, realizes the error of his ways, continues to count to the end of the fence, then goes back to subtract the posts he should not have counted in the first place. His count was correct. They are the 6th at the Pit Stop.

Bex: I am so glad they are not eliminated. I love Grandpa Don more and more each week.

Michelle: Excellent subtraction skills, Nicolas! I’m sure that saved a lot of time – I would have been dumb and started counting over.

Shana & Jennifer choose Count Down also. They continue to pick at each other and undermine each other’s confidence. By this time, they know they are done for. Their only hope is that this is a Non-Elimination Round. But, alas, after they finally get the total correct and walk hand-in-hand to the Pit Stop, Phil’s lip quivers as he delivers the news that they have been Philiminated.

Shana & Jennifer proclaim it was hard, as they are used to being pampered. But they are sad to leave and will always remain friends.

Bex: Ha! That’s rich. I bet they are cyber-bullying each other right now!

Michelle: Not to worry – with the blondes out we still have Nathan & Jennifer as the team that loves to fight with each other. Looks like we won’t be disappointed next week.