Preacher Season 1 Episode 5 recap: Going to church don’t make you a Christian

Preacher episode 5 Quincannot Green People Photo Credit: Lewis Jacobs/Sony Pictures Television/AMC
Jackie Earle Haley as Odin Quincannon, The Green People - Preacher

Dear Preacher fans: The world is sh-t and it’s all our fault. Now stop being sinners before Jesse gets involved. He’s not real good at using his powers yet, so we best take behaving upon ourselves.

Preacher really gets me thinking about people and faith and my faith in people (I said I wasn’t religious, but I can still have faith, so no busting my chops). Yeah, it’s harsh and violent and maybe a little too audacious, but it’s creative and entertaining. Some say it’s just too twisted … seen the news lately? It’s a parody, people, and the world ain’t Eden. I’m surprised it hasn’t drawn more viewers. It’s great TV.

Anyway, off my soapbox! The Cowboy returns. It’s 1881 again, and he’s made it to Ratwater for his daughter’s medicine. We get a little more of his back story.

Annville (Ratwater), it seems, started out a hell hole full of sinning bastards. It’s filthy, both literally and figuratively. Of course the towns in the Old West weren’t pretty by any means, but this place takes the cake.

The apothecary won’t have the medicine until morning, so the Cowboy heads over to the saloon. He takes it all in – a guy being tossed out the door, a brawl in the corner, a bag of scalps dumped out on the bar, whorin’, drinkin’, gamblin’ – it’s a busy place. When he requests a room, the barkeep asks, “Whore room or sleep room?” The Cowboy wants a sleep room, but they don’t have sleep rooms. A $5 bottle of whiskey gets him a free chair. He’s now stuck watching the idiotfest until morning.

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Preacher — Graham McTavish as The Cowboy, Forrest Frye as Apothecary Photo Credit: Lewis Jacobs/Sony Pictures Television/AMC

First thing he sees is the town preacher giving a sermon about Noah, which is really just sets up a crass joke. He gets an “AMEN!” from his audience and they drink to his performance. Then he hears the cries of a child. It’s a boy he saw earlier in the drug store. He and his parents had just come into town. Now, he is being forced to witness his mother’s rape as his father lies dead on the floor. Wow …

He’s interrupted when the preacher sits down. “I know you.” The Cowboy ignores him. The preacher is whisked away for more drinks. Seems he’s quite popular in Ratwater.

Early the next morning, the Cowboy grabs the medicine and slowly rides out of town, passing again under the tree decorated with scalped Indians. He also passes one of the wagons from the group he met on his way in. The boy who welcomed him is in the back. “We’re headed to Ratwater!”

The Cowboy rides on, but he can’t get what he saw and heard in Ratwater out of his head. Knowing what the waggoneers face, he turns around and hightails it back into the godforsaken town. It’s a horrible decision.

The wagon sits outside the saloon. When he busts in, the preacher approaches. “I remember you now!” The Cowboy slams him down and heads in. The waggoneers are in the back selling scalps. He returned for nothing. On top of it, he’s blindsided by the preacher’s cronies and beaten mercilessly. He manages to save the medicine and make it out alive.

Before he can leave, he’s confronted by the preacher. Both fought in the Civil War … they met at Pickett’s Charge. The preacher says he never saw a man “more in love with killin’” than the Cowboy. He remembers losing a lot of men and horses that day. He punctuates this by shooting the Cowboy’s horse.

Based on the conversation had before leaving, the Cowboy has a very long walk home. I don’t doubt he’ll make it. I do doubt he’ll find anything good. I’m right about both, and before his story ends for the episode, he raids a closet full of weapons.

Back in the present, Sheriff Root checks on a noise outside. Finding nothing, he tells Eugene to go to bed. When Eugene goes upstairs, he finds his room has been vandalized. There’s a shotgun leaned against a wall full of graffiti. It reads, “FINISH THE JOB.” Sheriff Root knows Eugene went to Tracy’s.

Jesse greets a new day in Annville. He leans against a tree that was once filled with scalped Indians. It looks a lot different against a rose-colored sky.

At the diner, he and Emily discuss church business. She’s concerned Cassidy hasn’t returned with the van. Jesse seems unconcerned about that and everything else. He’s not even surprised Odin Quincannon was in church, which Emily finds extremely off until Jesse mentions the bet.

A table of parishioners nearby is discussing Bible stuff. They urge Jesse to join them. Before he heads over, Emily says he’s not acting right – he’s not himself. He agrees. He’s full of God! And he seems to really be embracing his new “celebrity” status. He joyfully engages with his flock. Hmmm, where did I just see something like this? Oh, yeah! The beginning of the episode!

Cassidy wakes up to Tulip standing over him. He knows what she’s thinking, so he opens the floor for questions. She knows he’s a vampire, so he dispels and confirms some myths for her. Negative on the bat thing, but sunlight is an issue. She tells him to leave, but he’s not quite ready. He’s got some questions of his own … and a bit of a crush. Why wouldn’t he? She says she’s spoken for, and then tells Cassidy all about her boyfriend without ever saying “preacher.” Just that one word would have made things so much simpler.

Preacher episode 5 Cassidy Tulip
Joseph Gilgun as Cassidy, Ruth Negga as Tulip O’Hare Photo Credit: Lewis Jacobs/Sony Pictures Television/AMC

Donnie’s been absent since his little encounter with Jesse in the gas station john. He’s “sick.” He’s hiding in bed. His loving wife is concerned and gives him a pep talk about how the “South will rise again.” At least it better. It needs to go to work. She whips open the curtains and threatens to screw a co-worker if he doesn’t get his ass out of bed.

The God phone is still ringing. Whoever is calling has the patience of a Saint. Fiore and DeBlanc are rehearsing in the bathroom. It’s been decided that Fiore will pick up – he’s the “sweet one” – they love him up there! He looks really stressed out. He tries again. “Ello. It’s me, Fiore.” The phone continues to ring.

At the church, Emily literally gets caught with her pants down. Tulip catches her mid-pee and wants to know where Jesse’s at. Well, he’s at the diner with his new fans.

Poor, dear Eugene tries futilely to smooth things over with his dad. He tries to be helpful, but Root can’t stand it. He shoves the breakfast dishes to the floor and tells Eugene if he really wants to help, he should follow the directions painted on his bedroom wall.

This, my friends, is unconscionable. Root, you’re an asshole.

Donnie’s back at work. Odin is meeting with the mayor. He’s been wrong. He’s been selfish. He knows the town is in trouble, and he wants to do his part. Donnie looks skeptical. Odin Quincannon doesn’t admit he’s wrong! He’s not a nice guy! And he certainly doesn’t go to church!

The church thing pricks Donnie’s ears. He jumps up and asks what Jesse said to Odin. When he hears, he looks sick for real.

By the end of the meeting, Odin happily agrees to meet with Green Acres. With a cheers to “a new beginning,” things wrap up on a hopeful note. “The sun shines when you take time to look at it.”

At the diner, the crowd around Jesse has grown. He tells a worried father to “be patient.” Can’t wait to see how that pans out. Anyway, Tulip shows up and outs Jesse right in front of his congregation. Jesse’s a crook. The two of them used to run exotic reptiles for a Mexican cartel, and in a deal gone bad, he shot an innocent Komodo dragon right in the head. That’s who their preacher is … a violent Komodo-dragon-killing criminal. Nothing but B-A-D.

Honey … this is Annville (Ratwater).

Needless to say, he sweet-talks his way out of it. He’s changed! She can change. She can be good. It’s what everyone wants to be, right? He’s interrupted by a waitress who tells him “something” wants to talk to him outside, and “it” can’t come in because people are eating.

Well, guess what “it” is? Eugene has come to ask Jesse to pray for his dad. After their talk, Jesse says he’ll figure something out. He decides to pay a visit to Mrs. Loach with Eugene in tow.

Preacher Arseface
Ian Colletti as Arseface – Preacher Photo Credit: Lewis Jacobs/Sony Pictures Television/AMC

When they arrive, Mrs. Loach only sees Jesse at first. She’s happy to see him, but then she sees Eugene and unleashes on him with homicidal rage. She beats the hell out of Jesse’s truck, screaming “murderer!” until Jesse implores she step off. She backs away from the truck, but continues calling Eugene a murderer.

Okay, I’m a little confused. I’m pretty sure Tracy’s in a coma because she fell off a horse. What have I missed? How is Eugene connected to Tracy’s situation? Don’t tell me the blast from his suicide attempt spooked the horse she was riding … that’s a little much … but, it is Preacher. Maybe the horse story is just a story. Or maybe Mrs. Loach is just angry Eugene wanted to be dead and isn’t, while her daughter, by no fault of her own, is in a coma. I don’t know, but I’m sure it will come clear down the road.

Jesse tells Mrs. Loach to forgive. The rage leaves her face, and she embraces Eugene. All of the onlookers smile. Maybe Jesse is finally gaining an understanding of how to use his power. It actually chokes me up.

Donnie, who I thought was a box of rocks, has caught on. He knows. Jesse Custer has a power. He doesn’t know what it is, but he knows it’s big. He tells Betsy at lunch. She thinks he’s nuts, but says not to sweat it … sooner or later, Donnie’s “moment will come” and Jesse will get what he deserves.

Eugene, completely overwhelmed, asks Jesse what happened with Mrs. Loach. Jesse is whistling a tune and acting like it was nothing – just doing the Lord’s work, I guess. Honestly, his new persona is creeping me out. My observation about his likeness to the sh-t-bag preacher from Ratwater is too dead on now.

Tulip, looking all torn up inside, gets ready to rob a drugstore. Guess Jesse’s words have yet to have an impact on her.

Just as Fiore musters the nerve, the God phone stops ringing. Sh-t

Cassidy’s at the strip club across from the hardware store he asked about earlier. Tulip knew he’d be there, and she hands him the pharmaceuticals he also asked about earlier. He’s extremely happy to see her. They end up shagging in her car. Interesting! I guess it stands to reason. The whole diner scene pretty much sealed the deal. Jesse ain’t Jesse anymore, and Tulip wants Carlos dead. Who better to help her than a horny vampire with no morals whatsoever? It’s perfect.

DeBlanc and Fiore find Jesse in the diner giving parenting tips. They’ve given him money for his drugs and whoring – now they want what they paid for. He has no idea who they are or what they’re talking about, of course. They clarify. They’re from Heaven and what’s inside of him is definitely not God.

Jesse DeBlanc Fiore Preacher
Dominic Cooper as Jesse Custer, Tom Brooke as Fiore, Anatol Yusef as DeBlanc Photo Credit: Lewis Jacobs/Sony Pictures Television/AMC

As promised, Odin meets with Mayor Miles and the people from Green Acres. He welcomes them graciously with a big ol’ smile and snifters of brandy. He’s finally “seen the light” and seems genuinely excited to begin … using a giant gun to mow down Green Acres. Miles is aghast. “Yep! We grow or we die, Miles.” What?

Now for my questions!

  • What’s in store for Eugene? Is the town finally going to accept him, or did Jesse just make it worse? Look at what he did to Quincannon!
  • Fiore didn’t answer the God phone. Now what? You don’t honestly think anyone’s calling back after letting it ring that long!
  • How long before the diner starts charging $5 bottles of whiskey for a booth?
  • If what’s in Jesse isn’t God, what is it? The preacher from Ratwater?
  • Is Betsy right?

Sound off in the comments! I can’t wait to discuss! Follow me @KimberlyThies1. I always tweet during episodes.