Recap: Naked and Afraid Honduras “Strength in Pain”

Naked and Afraid Honduras

“AAh! There’s a snake on me!” It’s not as catchy as Sheriff Woody’s “There’s a snake in my boot,” but it’ll have to do as this episode’s catchphrase.

I was very touched that some of my regular N&A friends were worried that my unflinching honesty got me in trouble. Never fear, Channel Guide Magazine loves me because of (and in spite of) my honesty. My husband and I were just enjoying a few kid-free (and computer-free) days celebrating his recent milestone birthday.

This week we’re heading to the Atlantida region of Honduras. Hola Honduras!
It’s gonna be hot. It’s gonna be humid. It’s gonna be wet.
And it’s Naked and Afraid, so we’re gonna see lots of stock footage shots of snakes. And maybe a few real ones.
Ready? Let’s go!

Naked and Afraid Honduras
Bree

Bree Walker
Age: 30 years old
Occupation: Real Estate Agent
Current Residence: Denver, Colorado
Relationship Status: Single
Survival Skills: Shelter Building, Hunting and Gathering, Crafting Tools and Weapons, Navigation, Trapping, and Plant Identification
Bree grew up exploring nature, Her father, an avid adventurer himself, took her family around the world exploring new and exotic places and experiences, including the North Pole! Today, Bree credits her survival skills for her strength of character and confidence, spends her free time skiing, hiking, camping, biking, traveling, rock climbing, exploring, and adventuring. Bree mentions that she’s proudly sober and is totally adorable!!
Initial Primitive Survival Rating (PSR) 6.9 out of 10.0.

Naked and Afraid Honduras
Clarence

Clarence Gilmer II
Age: 35 years old
Occupation: Survival Instructor and Naturalist
Current Residence: No permanent residence, but originally from Baltimore, MD
Relationship Status: Single
Survival Skills: Shelter Building, Friction Fire, Tracking, Trapping
Clarence first learned about urban survival growing up in the dangerous streets of Baltimore. After a corporate career, Clarence used outdoor pursuits as a means of stress-management, and hiked the Appalachian Trail. In 2006, he quit corporate life and after a string of bizarre life-or-death incidents (including a sailboat crash in a tropical storm on his way to Brazil, getting robbed in Juarez, Mexico, and getting lost in the desert in Southern California) Clarence decided to up his survival skills, and learned from N&A alum Laura Zarra, and has become a well-trained survival expert. And when he’s not working as a survival expert, Clarence reveals that he is homeless. “I may no have a home, but I have a heart.”
This may be the first homeless survivalist on Naked and Afraid; how will his loner mentality work within a pair? But I gotta love his pink nail polish.
Clarence’s Initial Primitive Survival Rating (PSR) 7.2 out of 10.0.

Day 1
Bree and Clarence have barely gotten naked and it’s already raining. They throw together a shelter and it’s raining so hard that they can’t light a fire. They settle in for a cold and sleepless night.

It looks like they have a pot, a fire starter and a blade.

Day 2
The next morning, Clarence and Bree decide that their initial shelter was terrible, so Bree gets started building a shelter while Clarence tries to build fire. With a little zen-like patience, Clarence gets a fire going and when he spies a massive spider, he puts their inferno to use and have BBQd tarantula for lunch.

Naked and Afraid Honduras

Then Bree wants a drink, and she wants it NOW. She’d rather drink hot lava than wait a minute more for the boiling water to cool. Clarence suggests a sensible way to cool the water, but it falls on deaf — and thirsty — ears. That night, Bree slumbers while Clarence tends the fire all night long.

Day 3
The next morning, Clarence is grumpy, but works tirelessly to make his own shelter because he’d rather sleep alone.
That night, they call their goodnights, Walton-style.

That night, Clarence is awoken by a loud growl that is very close. Very, very close. So close that it’s coming from him. It’s the first time that Clarence has ever heard his tummy growl! That’s adorably embarrassing.

Day 4
The next morning, Clarence catches a tiny eyelash viper. A while later, Clarence’s tummy revolts from the snake supper and while he deals with intestinal unpleasantries, Bree is on fire duty. Impatient Bree simply scoops an armful of firewood onto the fire and heads on to her next task. And if her next task was setting Clarence’s shelter on fire, she’s succeeded. The most hilarious thing about incinerating the shelter was that she was busy talking to the camera while it was going up in flames behind her! LOL. Silly millennials; they’re always talking to cameras. “I hope the fire’s still going,” says Clarence as he wanders up to camp. But when he sees that his partner has destroyed his shelter, he just rolls his eyes and builds a new one. This time, it’s much farther away from his partner.

Bree is bummed that her partner wants nothing to do with her. But she seems like someone who is doggedly optimistic, so she’s not gonna give up on winning Clarence yet.

Day 5
Clarence is plagued by more tummy troubles.

Day 9
Bree makes gumbo-limbo tea for her partner.I checked out this interesting website for a few of the uses of Gumbo Limbo tree, it’s pretty fascinating and I don’t think this is the first time this tree has been used on N&A. I like that Bree’s using skills that she’s learned as part of her recovery to think about Clarence’s needs. The tea is a sweet peace offering and Clarence is really touched.

Naked and Afraid Honduras

That night, they sleep in their separate shelters and when a monsoon hits, they hunker separately for the next few days. Clarence is toasty in his mini-shelter, but Bree shivers in her tree house made for two.

Day 13
Clarence teaches Bree how to make a debris shelter so they can sleep closer together. Bree is thrilled to reestablish closeness with her partner, but doesn’t seem to notice that she’s moving from a nice, elevated shelter to one that is basically a pile of leaves. I love warmth a much as the next person, but I do not want to sleep on the ground. And that night, a snake slithers on top of Bree and she totally loses her S@#$. It’s no surprise that she doesn’t sleep a wink. Clarence doesn’t help things when he tells her that it was definitely poisonous. That’s one of those statements that you keep to yourself until after you’ve killed it.

Day 14
The next morning, Bree taps out. I am just as stunned as you are; I thought she was totally kidding. I get that there was a snake in your shelter, but you’re in a jungle! It would be weird if there wasn’t a snake in your shelter. When Bree asks Clarence if he’s going to be okay surviving on his own, he reminds her, “I am a one wolf wolfpack.” I think Clarence could have tried to keep his partner in the game a little harder; he didn’t seem supportive at all.

Clarence builds a river-side lean-to in hopes of staying away from snakes. But his night along the river is his worst one yet, because mosquitoes eat him all night long.

Even though Clarence’s backside has been used as a mosquito buffet, I think this latest shelter wins this the episode the greatest number of shelters built in a single episode of Naked and Afraid. Let’s count them:

  • The first night shelter
  • Bree’s elevated platform
  • Clarence’s highly flammable bachelor pad
  • Clarence’s debris shelter
  • Bree’s debris shelter, AKA the House of Slitherin
  • Clarence’s lean-to on the mosquito coast

Day 16
In the morning, Clarence sees that his river-side shelter has washed away. That’s okay, Clarence is used to throwing up shelters in 5 minutes, so it’s not a huge loss.

Day 18
Clarence has realized that being alone is lonely. And he entertains himself (and everyone at home) with many verses of “Amazing Grace.” It’s not amazing singing.

For the next few days, Clarence lies around. The montage is as boring as you’d guess.

Day 20
When Clarence hints that he wants to tap out, I honestly started yelling “No! It’s only one more day!!” thankfully, the lone wolf’s sensitive canine ears hear my pleas and he doesn’t tap out.

Day 21
Clarence is happy to leave his “snake coffin,” and has realized that he’s done with being alone. I’m amazed that he hasn’t eaten anything since day 3. It doesn’t seem like he’s tried to find any food since day 3 either.

While doing his extraction hike, Clarence comes across an amazing waterfall. He decides that his only option is to leap into the pool below the falls, despite not knowing the water’s depth. The mom in me yells, “This is how people get paralyzed!” But much like my children, Clarence ignores me and leaps into the fray anyway. Thankfully, he’s not injured and dog paddles to safety. Before long, Clarence is safe in a yellow truck and not a moment too soon. The exhausted man is running on fumes. “This challenge is over, but the adventure never ends,” he says.

Because Bree tapped out after only two weeks, her PSR falls from 6.9 to 4.8 out of 10.0.
After three weeks in Honduras, Clarence lost a whopping 40 pounds and his PSR rose from 7.2 to 7.9 out of 10.0. I think this is generous — he didn’t die, but did he really survive?

This is another episode that leaves me underwhelmed. Clarence made it for 21 days and that’s a terrific accomplishment. And he has great skill in building shelters. But was he prepared to do any food collection?

Naked and Afraid XL
This week we learned the identities of three more survivalists who will attempt the 40 day challenge.
Artist Steven Hall, Jr., who we met in this season’s Alabama premiere. He says, “I’m gonna make it, or you’re gonna have to drag me out of here!”
Angel from our recent adventure in Nicaragua. Yay!!! He was so sweet!!
Ryan Holt from the Everglades! I loved Ryan; he was such an outstanding survivalist. He’ll bring his amazing attitude, his giant beard and his fresh “thrive” tattoo to South Africa.

I gotta say, while this season of Naked and Afraid has been spotty, I am pretty excited for Naked and Afraid XL. It looks like a pretty good group. I’m excited to learn who’ll be revealed next week, and I’m hoping for a few wildcards to bring drama and/or antics as their survival item.

24 Comments

  1. Just watched the first episode of XL. They made odd groupings: they put the three butch uber-competent hunters together (Steven, Ryan and Angel) and then seemed to assemble the other groupings in descending order of competence. One chick already tapped out on the 4th day. The group with Clarence is going to fail miserably because he can’t be bothered to do anything, just like he did in the 21-day challenge. Poor guy would eventually die of malnutrition in the wild.

    What a weird season this is going to be. It’s obvious that the producers did not aim for any parity between groups, and arranged them so they could get wildly different success rates for added drama.

  2. Oh yes, losers all unite and keep commenting on naked people. Hey losers, is this the best you got to do with your lives? Are you that sad and pathetic that you have to comment on naked people running around the jungle? There are a total of four losers here commenting on this crap. Out of MILLIONS of people who watch tv, only you 4 pathetic losers are commenting on this garbage. What does that tell you folks? That you are four, lonely fat rejected weirdos who have nothing better to do with your lives. Please get some help for yourselves…..fast. I am with bif and bob.

    • Yes, it’s hilarious that there are 4 people commenting on the show yet there are 5 morons commenting on those people. Incredible as it may seem all 5 of the morons sound exactly alike as J. C. has pointed out. Aside from that perhaps Reverend Falwell might find a Target store to go and rant in. Maybe we’ll see a clip of him soon. Ralph, the newest incarnation of Bit so unabashedly copies his literary talent that there is no mistaking his provenance. However, all in all, it’s best not to feed the trolls, they get so frustrated they never show up again unless they try a different name.

  3. Hey Bif (or Bob, whoever you are today; maybe you’re the good Rev. Falwell today???). On 5/30, you wrote “Ok, let’s see which losers are still watching this garbage and can’t get their minds out of the gutter. C’mon losers, start commenting…..” (direct quote). It looks to me that YOU were the FIRST LOSER to write so, you dim wit, you WERE the first, duh???

  4. If they can’t give them clothes, must be someplace on the planet that’s reasonable mosquito free. Living in a snake pit is bad enough. Like to know how far they can travel towards extraction to camp. The waterfall Clarence jumped into looked like a better site.

    • Good question judi, I’ve wondered the same thing. Why not go as far as they can towards their extraction point while they still have energy and build camp there? That way, once they’re starving and emaciated, they wouldn’t have to travel so far to get out. I am also wondering if Clarence actually had to jump into that pool. Kellie was right; he didn’t know how deep it was, could have smashed into rocks although the producers already knew he would be safe. Not knowing, I would have figured out a way to go around it.

      As for you Rev, will get back to you later.

  5. Dear LauraJane, sorry to interject, but your hostility towards several people who are expressing their Constitutional rights to express themselves only indicates to me the deep shame and guilt you feel over watching immoral and perverted television viewing.

    Watching people run through the jungles naked actually reduces the wiener to nothing more than the animals who inhabit the woods and jungles.

    Whilst I may not agree with “bif” and “bob’s” ease of insulting viewers, they are very inarticulating the truth.

    Stop watching this filth, turn your mind away from Satan and repent for your sinful behavior.

  6. TO BIF AND BOB, if you hate the show so much, don’t watch it. You both have been ragging on KenO and J.C. Atwell. They are the best contributors to this forum, very informative and knowledgeable; why are you giving them so much shit? You both sound like hillbilly, dumb-ass losers who probably don’t have a full mouth of teeth between the two of you. Didn’t I see your relatives in “Deliverance”; surprised you can even operate a computer. Do either of you play the banjo? Don’t you have stills to tend to in the mountains behind your shack houses? I’m not worried about KenO and J.C.; they’re both going to kick your asshole asses. Find something else to do; don’t you have a sheep to fuck or a possum to trap for supper?

    • Laurajane.
      Attagirl. No beating around the bush on what you think of trolls. I am still laughing!

    • Maybe I’m wrong on ‘BIF & BOB”; should probably refer to them as “BEAVIS & BUTTHEAD” 🙂

      • Actually it’s “Bif”, “bob” and “Bit”, they’re all the same troll operating under different names and not too creative either.

        • I was thinking the same thing, one guy writing under 2 different names, both buttheads, though one guy with nothing to do but badmouth people who do enjoy the show, even though we gripe and complain, and this forum is half the fun of watching N&A. He obviously watches it too so why should he bitch about those of us who do? WTF? My favorite, since I saw him in Thailand, is still Darrin. He has great survival skills after being dumped by his parents at age 9; however, he has poor social skills, mostly due to his being alone most of his life. I am really rooting for Darrin. I think he can take on anyone on XL.

        • KenO. No matter what name the troll uses, his inability to spell or structure a sentence is a dead giveaway of his identity. The troll is utterly confused by words over two syllables. I once taught a course to mentally challenged 10 year old children who had a higher mental acumen than the troll.

  7. Hi Kellie, so glad you’re back; we all missed you. You were commenting on this year’s XL “wildcard” for drama. That will definitely be Carrie; have no idea why she would ever be allowed to come back. She is nasty, sullen, lazy, has absolutely no skills and ran off with the extraction point map on Day 21. She’s going to make Alana and Eva look like angels.

  8. So, let’s see now. All of us are pretty much in agreement as to noticing how poorly the selection of participants have been the last couple of years. Now the standards have fallen so low that Metal Flowers has now stooped to bringing on a homeless loser and allowed him to literally run off an intelligent and competent participant. Can you imagine being spooked by your own stomach growling? I’m actually glad she woke up and figured out there was no percentage in sticking around with Clarence, the 35 year old homeless loser who can’t make a decent shelter, find food or even forage for it. Can you imagine what it might be like to share very, very close quarters with a fat, hulking slob like him? There’ no doubt his laziness included poor personal hygiene since he had no problem with living in a pile of trash.

    • KenO. If they do actually have “thousands” of applicants that they subject to “rigorous physical and mental screening.” They must tinker with it to produce the spotty selections of this season. It must go something like this: “Aha, we have this competent and normal survivalist so lets pair him/her with this Borderline Personality, Anti Social Personality or this outright Lunatic and see what happens.”

      • Haha, J.C. that’s exactly the way I see it. Either that or they are completely incompetent.

  9. Oh this is too good to be true. The same loses are back. This is awesome! Losers everywhere unite and lets all watch this garbage together. Yes, all you fat, miserable, couch ridden losers, let’s all get together and cheer for this garbage.

    Way to go losers!!!!!!

    • Hey Bob, if we’re all losers for watching the show, then you need to include yourself in this group. Why are you watching it if only fat, miserable, couch-ridden losers watch this garbage. Obviously, you’re right in there with the rest of us.

  10. So glad you were just on vacation Kellie and that everything is ok. Well this weeks episode proves a number of things: 1. It doesn’t take brains to survive for 21 days, just fat. 2. Lazy wins again. 3. Sometimes it takes brains to tap out. 4. Shelter building skills don’t always mean anything (6 shelters and not one of them was worth a shit). 5. Singing isn’t a needed survival skill. 6. Beware of someone who’s nearly panicked by hearing their stomach growl. All in all I think I would have chosen to sleep somewhere else than with Clarence. I would have tapped out the first day just from looking at him, I wouldn’t have even had to hear him sing. Clarence’s skills: Shelter building, zero (unless you consider sleeping in a compost pile a skill). Fire making, um well yeah but building a fire inside a pile of leaves means your shelter is going up in smoke, inevitably. Hunting, hunh? Food gathering, hunh? Being a team mate, duh? Having consideration for your partner, well considering you’re a big, fat, gay man with a pretty sweet chick um, no surprise there. Bree’s skills: knowing when to get the hell out of there, aces. Still don’t think Clarence should have recieved any kind of bump up in his PSR, but then again we still don’t have clue as to why PSR’s are assessed or what moron does it. Maybe Bif does them.
    On the high side we know that Angel, Steve and Ryan are going to be in the XL offering, so yay.

  11. Kellie,
    The better part of this episode was the announcement that Steven, Angel, and Ryan will return for XL2.
    The episode leaves a bad taste in the mouth. A competent, vivacious, impulsive and industrious woman was paired with a cold, unfeeling and no personality man resulting in a failed episode. The shows “brain trust” drama they had planed for was totally absent. So, Clarence spends the last 15 minutes of the show talking to himself about how tough it is to be alone. Duh!! Resembles the troll you have picked up who talks to himself under many names on this and other shows you review.

  12. Ok, let’s see which losers are still watching this garbage and can’t get their minds out of the gutter.

    C’mon losers, start commenting……

Comments are closed.