by Ruth Anne Boulet
Tonight’s results show is a whole ton of filler for a 5 second show. I know that all results shows are a ton of filler, but with this episode, American Idol is shoving as many performances as possible to keep our interest. That’s probably a wise move. As the season draws to a close, viewers get more & more emotionally invested in the outcome. There’s less tolerance for stupid patter between the judges.
Like a really stupid Ford commercial. Wow. Does American Idol want Ford to go away? It seems like it with the amount of effort, or lack of effort, that has been going into those thing lately.
Group number, featuring Slash! Schools out for swine flu kids! Way to keep it topical American Idol! Slash is playing like he’s barely paying attention to the kids singing. He just wants to riff it many. Danny and Kris look so uncomfortable. Ryan also looks like Slash told him before the show not to violate his personal space or Ryan would get pummeled. I would not be surprised if that conversation occurred.
Ryan ‘casually chats’ with the contestants. It’s pretty boring, except for Adam saying that he liked his outfit and Danny admitting that he thought the scream was horrible, once he heard it back later. Thank the good Lord for small favors.
Then we get the Paula performance. She’s about as good at lip-syncing as some of the Idol kids. And what’s with the ‘hey, gentlemen, I’m just here for the music’ at the end? Corny, Paula. Then we get No Doubt. Gwen Stefani is definitely singing. And running around like a crazed maniac. She dresses like many of the girls we went to college with. No Doubt is going on tour this summer, even though they don’t have a new album out. They’re going on tour for ‘inspiration.’ I’m sure the money will be nice too.
We get a reminder of what the top three get when they get to ‘go home.’ Some get to go to malls. Others get cheerleaders.
The top four are brought out to the stage. They all look like they’re in various stages of wanting to vomit. Ryan recaps each contestant’s performances. He has already told us that the three finalists will be named in no particular order. Thank you American Idol for finally admitting that other than being voted off, the order of the names really doesn’t matter.
First person in the top three is Kris Allen, and boy does he look shocked. So does his wife. Of course, it’s time to go to commercial.
With three contestants to go, we get a recap of how ‘the anointed one’ can get the axe early. Daughtry was eliminated this very week. So we get to visit with Christopher Lowell and he & his band debut their new song. Lots of folks think he’s really keen; I was never that into him. He always sounded the same to me. Kind of like, um, Gokey.
I have to say, though, that although I think it’s Danny Gokey’s week to go, part of me will be sad if that happens. Milwaukee could use some good publicity, so I’d like to see what they put together for Danny’s ‘going home’ package. It’d also be fun to see a little American Idol chaos in the city. But, really, after that screech last night, it’s his time to go.
Back to business — Ryan recaps that Kris is safe, and still looks nauseous. Dim the lights. Second person heading to their hometown is Adam. Hooray! Not like he’s going far, he lives in the ‘hood. We’re down to Allison and Danny. Michael Slezak is freaking out right now. DAMN! Allison is going home. Danny is safe. I’m sad to see her go, but really, she’s already won a contest like this, and she’s 17. I would be shocked if she didn’t get a record deal soon.
Another good thing about Danny not getting eliminated? We don’t have to hear “Dream On” again. Bye Allison. I sincerely hope we hear from you soon.
Now, do I try & boogie out of work on Friday to see Gokey mania? That is the question.
