After many exciting adventures and a bout with alcoholism, Mr. Turtle returns to the trailer park to find Earl and Randy living there while Joy and Darnell are under witness protection. Earl finds a note that Darnell left in Mr. Turtle’s food with a phone number where Darnell can be reached. Earl calls Darnell’s hair phone, and Darnell gives Earl the address where he can ship Mr. Turtle. But Earl realizes he can’t really snail mail a turtle, and he’ll have to drive to Darnell’s address to deliver it personally. Earl finds that Joy is dealing with a little crisis. She’s not fitting in with the other ladies in their ritzy gated community. You can take Joy out of the trailer park, but you can’t take the trailer park out of Joy. She doesn’t want to be seen with a low-life like Earl hanging around, so Joy kicks him out. But as Earl’s backing up the El Camino, a blast of car exhaust blinds one of the neighbor’s dogs. Earl takes the dog, Gucci, to the vet and then returns him to his owner, Carol (Morgan Fairchild). Earl tells Carol about his list and karma, and she is enthralled.
It seems Carol and her friends are having trouble sleeping. They’ve tried all the latest trendy New Age techniques, but nothing works. Joy tells Carol and her friends that Earl has been her spiritual guru, and she invites everyone over to her house for a special karma clinic from Earl. The ladies are inspired by Earl, and they start doing good things — mostly for their maids, housekeepers and nannies. But the ladies are expecting karma to deliver good things like pools, jets and boob jobs, and Earl promises them that karma will provide all they want within a week. Earl spends a frenzied, sleepless week of figuring out how to make karma come through on its promises. But at the end of the week, the ladies show up and tell Earl that karma has delivered the best thing of all: peace of mind and a good night’s sleep.
Meanwhile, the Crab Shack has become a little more “festive” since Darnell left. Gay Kenny is working there to make some extra cash (his IRA is in the dumper), and he’s added specialty martinis and a lot of new gay customers. Randy’s feeling lonely with Earl gone to deliver Mr. Turtle, and he makes a new friend, Jim, who moves in with Randy for a few days. Of course, Jim has more-than-just-friends ideas with Randy, who has no idea that Jim plays for the other team. After three nights of sleeping over with Randy, Jim’s a little confused and frustrated. But Earl returns, and Jim flees out the back window.
What We Learned
If you spend a decade living next to the hog-rendering plant, the smell will get into your pores.
KARMA stands for Karma, Awesome, Really good, Most wonderful, America.
Baby egg pies are called “kweeshes.”
If you’re always drunk and can’t swim, a pool is probably not a good idea.
Wisdom From Randy: To Wong Foo sounds like it’s got a lot of ass-kickin’.
Crab Man Chronicles: Endless breadsticks and salad means endless breadsticks and salad.
